The Queendom

Handmade Ornament Swap

2011-11-08T11:00:00.000-05:00

I participated in ornament swaps with people all over the US and other countries a few years ago. I did it for a few years in a row and it was SUCH a blast!! As I was going through my blogroll this morning I saw a post that invited me to participate in a new ornament swap.**Happy Dance**I love ornament swaps!Come join in on the fun, too!

Delve Right In

2011-10-08T12:57:00.008-04:00

I have been on a Scripture Marking Spree!

I found some amazing scripture marking ideas from The Red Headed Hostess. AMAZING! And I love personalizing my scriptures. They are full of personal notes and comments about things in my personal life. I hardly ever let anyone use my scriptures, because they have so many personal insights in them.

When I first got my Quad (a set of Scriptures with all 4 Books of Scripture in one book: The Bible, The Book of Mormon, Doctrine & Covenants, and The Pearl of Great Price) I decided that I would mark every reference from every hymn in the Hymnal in my scriptures. It was very enlightening to see how these scriptures could cross-reference with hymns. Hymns are a wonderful way to accompany your scripture study.

So now I found these "Page Titles" to add to the Book of Mormon. Basically, every page has a title that you write in to your scriptures. This way, you always know what's happening on a particular page and it can help you find scriptures quickly and read in context if you are just randomly selecting a page to read. I thought it was a great idea. I have been staying up late every night this week working on this project.

My workspace

It has really strengthened my testimony of the Power of the Book of Mormon. It's truths are so apparent, even if you are just summarizing events (or pages, in this case). You can feel the Spirit as you read, and write these notes. It has been particularly uplifting to go through the whole story of the Book of Mormon all at once. I was able to make connections and insights that weren't so obvious to me before.

I encourage you to make your scriptures your own, and make notes in the margins that will help you remember the inspirations you receive as you read. This way we will truly "liken all scriptures unto us, that it might be for our profit and learning." 1 Nephi 19:23

*Drop me a line if you'd like me to send you a free, non-committal copy of the Book of Mormon.

Reading Every day

2011-10-05T15:11:00.003-04:00

When I was expecting our first child, I was going through all of the "New Mommy" stages, where you begin to evaluate every single aspect of your life to make sure that you will be the best mother possible. I looked at the ordinary: child safety, proper bedding and vehicle restraints, etc. Then I began looking into the more personal and spiritual. How will I teach this child everything he needs to know so he can live a happy and good life?! So, I evaluated the basics.

We were good people, from good families that went to church and lived good lives. We magnified our church assignments and always tried to take the high road. But we weren't perfect. There were things that needed improving and one of those things was reading the scriptures every day. This needed to change.

So the hubs and I started reading at least one chapter of the Book of Mormon every day. We would read, and discuss what we learned. Every night I would have something new to ponder about and every night I felt strengthened by the Spirit that comes into your life when you read the scriptures. The Book of Mormon teaches you how to be a better parent. All throughout the book you read about how someone is teaching their child how to be better; how to follow the Savior; how to be closer to God. The Book of Mormon teaches what Christ taught here on earth. It expands on what we learn from His teachings in the Bible.

Reading this book intensely changed our lives. We were happier, we were more sensitive to the promptings of the Holy Spirit, we were closer to one another and we felt it's power. We went through the book almost twice before our little one arrived. We felt so strengthened, and I'm so grateful we began this endeavor to read every day.

This is me.

2011-10-04T15:38:00.002-04:00

I have not been very open to my specific beliefs on my blog before, for fear of ridicule or judgement. But this is who I am. My religion is not just my church, it's not just something I believe or follow; but rather it is who I am. Everything in my life is based on the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I don't intend to make this a religious blog, or anything like that; but I do feel that I need to devote some time to sharing what I believe. This month I am participating in a month long forum about the Book of Mormon. This book is another testament of Jesus Christ. It backs up the Bible and teaches about Christ coming to the Americas. I will be posting about this book all month long. I've given it a lot of thought, and I know I need to do this. If you don't care to know about what I think on this subject, then you don't have to read.

If you'd like to know about what other people think of this sacred book, then you can visit my friend Jocelyn's blog where she is spear-heading this forum. If you would like a copy of this book, let me know and I will mail you one, no charge, no obligation. I just ask that you read it. The Book of Mormon contains beautiful truths and teachings of Christ, and I don't know where my life would be without it.

Blessings never cease

2011-09-13T09:15:00.004-04:00

Our baby had to be put to sleep on Saturday. It was gut wrenching. It was one of the most difficult moments of my life, if not the most. Smoochie was a few days short of being 15 years old. I got her from my parents the day I got back from my first Youth Conference. I was a freshman in High School. She brought much joy into my life, and into the lives of those around me. I remember the first time I was away from her. I had just moved to Indiana, and I would be away from her for about 5 months, until Ben and I would get married. I cried most nights because I missed her so much. I was so happy when we brought her back to Indiana with us after our honeymoon.

She helped me get through a lot of hard times in my life. She was there, comforting me, when I had such a hard time getting pregnant. She wanted to play when I was sad and she loved to cuddle in bed with Ben. She loved to play catch! Her favorite treats were fruit; she loved mango, and bananas and she would beg to no end for some apple. She would also bark and bark and bark at you if you were having popcorn. She loved popcorn! Her loss for me has been pretty close to unbearable. I have cried to the point where my head is pounding and my eyes are swollen. This is a pain and emptiness I would not wish on my worst enemy.

Smoochie was very sick, with an infection in her uterus, a severe heart murmur and some trouble with breathing. She had a very long, and good life. I am blessed to have had her in my life, to have shared her with my husband Ben, and to have her be such a big part in the lives of my children. I love her forever, and forever she will be my Baby Bear.

As I searched the scriptures for comfort the night she passed on, I came across some verses in D&C section 77. It talked about the eternal felicity of animals after they've gone. I was so humbled at the fact that Heavenly Father helped me find specific comfort. In a world where there are bigger problems and more awful trials, He cared enough to lead me to read something that was specific to my pain. He knows and loves me; He listens to and answers my prayers. I will see my Smoochie Bear again. And I will continue to rejoice at the love and the blessings that are poured into my life by a Father whose love and care for me is Everlasting, despite the pain or trial I may experience. We are never alone.

ZOORIFFIC!

2011-05-03T15:13:00.011-04:00

We went to the zoo this weekend. We LOVE our zoo! It's one of the best we've been to. We are enjoying our yearly membership. So this weekend we decided on a whim to go to the zoo for a couple of hours. It was crazy hot, but we had a great time. The boys each got a fun little monkey at the end of the trip. They both love monkeys!

This is one of my most favorite things about Florida. The beautiful Palm trees ! Every time I look at them it feels so surreal that we're here.

Ben was hurrying to the car-it was so hot and we were ready to cool down!

The zoo also has botanical gardens inside. The greenery in this zoo is just amazing! They have so many trees and flowers, and lots of pretty things to smell and look at! So I took pictures of some pretty flowers to use as desktops.

BAMBOO!

They were gorgeous to look at and smelled good too!

This was one of my favorite pictures of the trip.

Here is the dock at one end of the zoo.

And the view off to one side of the dock.

Here the boys are listening to some live music. It was Earth Day at the zoo, so they had live music and some booths around the zoo from different organizations promoting "Green" living and things of the sort.

They're so cool. :-P

We got to pet goats,

and even brush their fur. The boys REALLY enjoyed this!

Because of the Earth Day celebrations, they also had this fun inflatable slide. This thing was huge! Ben had fun, but he said it was scary.

Ezra loved it. He tumbled at the very end of his sliding down and planted himself face first at the bottom.

Ben, the Daddy, went on it with the boys and he loved it, too. I had a turn myself, with Ezra (Ben didn't want to go on it again) and I squealed on the way down! That slide was way tall and waaay steep! But it was a blast!

There was a booth with Magnolia Tree Saplings. The boys got to plant one each and take it home.

They had a good time doing this. Ben did a great job putting dirt in his pot, but Ezra seemed to think it was yucky. They get into the dirt when you don't want them to, but when you want them to, they don't want to. Boys! Gotta love'em!

This is the best picture we got of the carousel ride. Ezra is looking away and I'm trying to peer over the moving alligator Benny was on. That carousel was PACKED!

Isn't this flower beautiful? It looks much bigger than it really was.

And this picture looks 10 times better than I thought it would.

Flamingos! They were fun to watch.

We had a great time at the zoo. They boys quickly asked when we were coming back. We'll be back very soon.

High Adventure

2011-04-27T16:49:00.004-04:00

The 4th year High Adventure for my Stake was this past weekend. You know I took my camera! But if you know me well, you know I forgot to use it.

It's quite frustrating, really. I want to take pictures, but I'd rather be hands free and enjoy myself. I need to do better about it. I'm working on it!

So this weekend I relied on my dear friend Kacey, who went on the camping trip, too. I told her she'd have to send me her pictures since I had a picture FAIL!

Here is a group picture, with our fun Fabulous Flying Monkey t-shirts. I'm so excited for the actual week of camp! Can't wait!!

Happy Easter!

2011-04-25T01:19:00.002-04:00

Easter Fun

2011-04-20T15:56:00.009-04:00

I loaded my pictures backwards. So enjoy it from end to beginning.

We had our Ward Easter Egg Hunt put on by the Primary. We ended with a fun egg hunt in the field at the church. The boys had a complete blast!!! It was their first hunt. Ezra loved it to the point he had a melt down when all the eggs were gone and it was time to go home.

We also decorated spring themed cookies and got to eat them. Ezra started eating his before I even reached across the table to get the frosting! Benny was patient and waited to decorate his cookie before munching on.

The kids got to color pictures, too. They got to use markers, and that was a real treat for the boys! They hardly get to use markers (even though we have containers full of them).

The primary president started off the activity with a spiritual thought and game. The kids each got to pick a picture out of a folder and place it either on the "Not Easter" board, or the "Easter Board." Basically, anything related to the real Easter story got put on the "Easter: board. Eggs, bunnies and jelly bean pictures got put in the "not" board. All the kids had a great time doing that. We have a great primary presidency!

The boys got to hang out with their best buddy, Braden. We love Braden's family.

And on that note, we love our new ward, and our new home in Florida. We love our new friends and we really love the weather. And, I really love the fact that I know that I have a Savior that came to earth and died for me. But he lives! He was resurrected and He is the way we will all get to return to our Father in heaven and live with Them again someday. I love that I have the knowledge and the opportunity to teach that to my children. Happy Easter Season!

Whistle While You Work...

2011-04-19T00:35:00.011-04:00

Time has flown and our little guys are big enough to help around the house. House work never ends and if Mommy can get help, she's gonna take it! The boys love being helpers and are really good about cleaning up. That convinced me that it was time for them to have a chore chart. We planned this about a month or two in advance. I searched for the materials I wanted and worked on a Family Home Evening lesson that would tie everything in, a chore chart, responsibilities, working, and an allowance with money jars.

Here is Ezra posing with his new money jars. Boy, was he excited to get to drop coins in his jars! We decided that we would start them off with a couple of dollar bills. We showed Ezra some dollar bills and asked him what they was. We expected him to say "money" but instead he very quickly and clearly said "Cash!" We thought it was so funny! Who knows where he got that from!

Here is Ben with his money jars. He was so excited to get to separate the money and distribute it. He put a lot of his money into his Mission fund, because he can't wait to be 19 and go on a mission. He said he wants to go to Mexico on his mission.

I explained that the boys would have daily responsibilities that they needed to get gone. Once they did those, any other jobs they did would make them eligible to receive payment in form of money. I used clip-art to show what the jobs are, since they can't read yet. I also used some already made chore charts I got from Target dollar section to place the clip-art on. we put them on on a wall in our dining room, where they will see it multiple times a day, and be reminded that they too have to help.

On the back of each jar I used stick on letters to write their name so that we never confused which one belongs to whom.

The different jars are labeled "Mission" so they can save up for their missions; "Tithing" so they can put away the 10% of what they earn to pay in tithing; and "Savings" where we encourage them to save their money, and/or save up for something they really want.

I keep them together in the little "box" that the jars originally came from. My goal is to cover it in paper or mod podge it or maybe even just paint it. But I haven't gotten there yet.

Here are the charts I made with so much love. I didn't have a laminator so I used clear packing tape to laminate each square of clip-art.

It was a great FHE night. So far they've done pretty well. I hope this will allow them to be more responsible than I was while I was growing up. They had a blast with talking about all the different jobs they now had and with counting their money.

General Conference Weekend

2011-04-10T20:38:00.008-04:00

This year's General Conference was fantastic! If you missed it, you can watch or listen here.

We set up a small folding table in the middle of the living room and prepared some fun snacks and lunch along with coloring and activity pages that were themed for Conference. The boys had a great time!

One of my favorite and uplifting talks of this years co

nference was Quentin L. Cook's. It was titled "LDS Women Are Incredible!" and one of the most amazing quotes (for me) was:

Our women are not incredible because they have managed to avoid the difficulties of life—quite the opposite. They are incredible because of the way they face the trials of life. Despite the challenges and tests life has to offer—from marriage or lack of marriage, children’s choices, poor health, lack of opportunities, and many other problems—they remain remarkably strong and immovable and true to the faith. Our sisters throughout the Church consistently “succor the weak, lift up the hands which hang down, and strengthen the feeble knees.”

What a strengthening weekend it was! Here are

some pictures. Not many, I know, because we were too busy watching!

Orlando Temple

2011-02-28T11:32:00.006-05:00

A few months ago we went to the Orlando Temple. We didnt go inside, but instead we hung out at the grounds and enjoyed soaking up the sun andtaking pictures. This was the first time the boys were at any temple, so it was neat to talk to them about it. Here are some pics.

Where are the Wintertime Blues?

2011-01-19T15:26:00.002-05:00

Usually by this time in the year I'm just deeply yearning (imagine me stretching and reaching far out into the distance with a real look of yearning in my face-almost to the point of desperation) for the Spring to arrive, with its beautiful buds, warm bright sunshine and the sound of birds chirping the day away. I even wish for the Summer to hurry and skip over Spring. The Wintertime Blues are very well known to me. I try to pretend they haven't arrived, when in fact they've already moved in and unpacked the suitcases.

This year, however, is different. Very. I guess those Blues didn't get the address change and couldn't make it this year. Living in Florida has been phenomenal! I know its Winter; I get it. When we moved here people told us that we would love this season's Winter and that next year we would be more acclimated and freeze our little (or big) tushies off just like the rest of the Floridians.

Not so!

I am already freezing my little (big, really) tushie off! I'm a wimp, I guess. But this 50's weather is COLD! And then I laugh about it when I talk with family elsewhere in the country. They are in ranges of the teens to the 40s. Disclaimer: I'm not complaining!! I've got it good, and I know it!

So on a day where the temperature is 54degrees, I will wear my sweater, my scarf and my coat. And I feel kinda silly, because back in IN or NJ I would be celebrating that I only have to wear a jacket. But here, I can get away with it because lots of people do that. I like to be warm. I love to be warm.

The sky is still blue and the sun shines through, even if it is really cold out. Not so many gray, dark, cloudy, ugly days here. There aren't mountains of dirty snow that won't melt away, either. The trees aren't pretty (yet), but everything else makes up for it. I've been feeling pretty good! I'm still excited for the Spring, but I'm not desperately reaching for it.

Goodbye Wintertime Blues.

Hello Florida! I am falling for you, fast!

Papas Rellenas

2011-01-08T12:28:00.006-05:00

Last week, on the first day of the new year, I decided I was going to make something really yummy and out of the ordinary for dinner. The problem was I had no idea what I was going to make. So as I stood in the kitchen thinking about things I enjoyed eating that I hadn't had in a long time I remembered the fabulous and delicious CubanInTheMidwest. Ivonne's blog is pretty much the epitome of the food I ate throughout my childhood. Growing up in urban NJ we had a true melting pot of Latinos from everywhere and I had a lot of the things she posts about. She is fantastic, with great recipes and pictures and directions for making delicious Cuban or Cuban-inspired food.

So I remembered that she made PapasRellenas or Meat Stuffed Potatoes. I already had garlic parmesan mashed potatoes made from scratch that had been leftover from dinner the other night. And I also had some picadillo (cooked ground beef) that would be enough for the potatoes.

I didn't follow her exact recipe since my "ingredients" were leftovers. And I used Panko bread crumbs, instead of regular. Here are a few pictures from my cooking.

Potato Ball already stuffed

Already breaded potato balls

In the frying pan!

These were soooo good! We scarfed them down before I realized I never took photos of the finished product. We made a yummy dipping sauce with ketchup and hot sauce (Cholula brand hot sauce is the best!) Please visit Ivonne'sRecipe to see how EASY this is and so worth the time! She says its quite messy, but my mess wasn't bad at all. Mmmm, so good!

Thank Goodness for Insurance?

2011-01-06T13:04:00.000-05:00

Monday night, jammies are on and shortly it will be bed time.
Ezra cuts his left middle finger.
Lots of blood.
Inside "meat" is exposed. (thats what they called it while at Urgent Care. Yeah, real professional)
We bandage it and decide it's pretty bad we need to take him to said urgent care. They close in about 20 minutes.
We make it 5 minutes before closing time. We get told he needs to go to the emergency room at the hospital. Ben thinks they were brushing us off because they wanted to go home sooner than later.
We wait at the ER waiting room for almost 3 hours.
Come midnight thirty the nurse cleans the wound, adds a numbing cream, dressing, and gets the finger bandaged, pretty much the same way I bandaged it at home.
We get a couple extra of the above and are told we should change it daily.
We get discharged.

No X-rays, no stitches, no cast...

Our bill is over $2600.

Yeah, we've got insurance, but we still have to pay close to $500 out of pocket.

For pretty much a bandaid.

Awesome.

Kitchen-escapades (to come)

2010-12-20T14:43:00.002-05:00

It is wonderful to have all of my things back, especially my kitchen things. Now that we are totally unpacked and have everything is out of storage I can use my own things again. I don't have anything fancy or special, nor do I have special or expensive gadgets. But what I do have, I love!

I have been wanting to start using my things again, but just haven't had the real motivation to get my things out and get cookin'. I have stuck to the regular pots and pans. Nothing fancy. On Sunday, at church, the lesson was about using our leisure time wisely. We should develop our talents and work on meaningful things instead of just constantly vegetating on the couch and watching mindless TV, for example. A list was made on the board about what sorts of things we spend our time doing, that aren't responsibilities (like work and school). I suggested adding to the list "baking" and my new dear friend Katy asked me if I enjoyed cooking. I immediately answered in the affirmative and then got to thinking: "Yes, I do like cooking. In fact, I love it. I love baking, too. I love creating things for my family and friends to enjoy. But I haven't done it a while. I haven't really developed this talent of mine the way I would like to."

So, thanks Katy for reminding me of one of my passions that I had put on the back burner, no pun intended. :-)

So today, I'm using my bread maker and my food processor. Both of which I've only used less than a handful of times. I'm also using my oven and my hands! Talent developing, here I come!

sorry for the lack of photos. once we get our new computer this will be remedied.

it just takes way too long for me to upload. and i dont feel like using google images :-)

Didn't your momma teach you?

2010-12-16T15:13:00.002-05:00

Responsibility.
Respect.
Honesty?
How about plain ol' common decency?

I'm so irritated right now at people who don't have these qualities. Our tenants quit paying and then after we tried (unsuccessfully) to contact them they abandoned the property. So we're left with a broken lease, unpaid rent from them and a migraine. To boot, we've got to pay a utility bill that they didn't pay, simply because we own the property. As if we haven't already been screwed enough.

Ive had a whirlwind of emotions and not so nice thoughts in the transcourse of things...
I've been frustrated, annoyed, impatient, irritated. I've wondered if buying a house in the first place was a mistake. I loved my blue house with the yellow living room, green kitchen, and bedrooms of blue, tan and lavender. I did. If I could have taken it with us, I would have. That house made me happy and held so many important events and memories.

But now, I really do wish sometimes that those walls had never belonged to me. I would have been just as content in the apartment we had been in before we bought the house. I LOVED that apartment. Now, I wish I could turn back time and just have walked away before signing that binding contract. That house no longer makes me happy. It makes me tired and oddly unreasonable. But I digress...

To the abandoners, didn't your momma teach you to be responsible? Didn't your momma teach you to face your problems and try to find a solution? We could have helped. We could have worked something out. But you just left like a thief in the night. Scurrying around trying not to get caught.

My momma did teach me. She taught me the value and importance of forgiveness and of faith. I forgive and now move forward. I'm not looking back because its a waste of energy. Valuable energy that can be placed on something far better. Somehow this will turn out OK in the end. Even if it seems like its a negative outcome, I know its a blessing in disguise. And no one can tell me otherwise. Because my momma taught me never to doubt my intuition. My momma taught me well.

I'm back!

2010-12-12T20:10:00.002-05:00

The kids are in bed (although totally not asleep!), Ben is keeping busy and I decided I was going to look at my blog again after months of neglect. I am determined to start blogging again! Things aren't as crazy anymore and I feel like naormality is creeping up on us again. Hooray!

So I'll make my returning debut post simple and easy...

Florida is wonderful! We LOVE it! We love the area we live in, we love our new home, we absolutely love our new ward and the new friends we are making.

The boys are growing ever so quickly! Benny will be starting Primary in the sunbeams class in January and Ezra just turned 2!

We are so excited for Christmas to come, too! It will be a great year with new memories and new traditions started.

We miss our family in Indiana and New Jersey, but we feel like this is home now. We're so excited for this new chapter in our lives! Thanks for sticking around and reading! I'll be sure to keep my blog updated!

I heart $hopping

2010-07-29T14:01:00.003-04:00

I LOVE to shop. Oh my goodness, it relieves stress better than a hot bath with candles and aroma therapy. It works better to cheer me up than chocolate cake and ice cream. Shopping causes euphoria in me and it makes me want to do the happy dance.

But my love of shopping does not mean that I have maxed credit cards, or that I spend money on anything just for the sake of buying something, even if its a great deal. Sometimes I "shop" without buying anything. When i do that, I feel most proud of myself; but it doesn't happen very often.

I'm a deal seeker. Hard-core. Although I know many people who do get better deals than I do, for the most part I fare really well. I am most successful when I grocery shop. I usually walk out of the store with a receipt that says I saved from 50-60% and my savings vary from $50 to $100. I use coupons, sales, and rebates. Yeah, its time consuming, but I LOVE it. It helps me de-stress and gives me motivation to find better deals. I grocery shop at two different stores that i think have the best deals and are the most location-convenient to me. Sure, I don't do one stop shopping, but that isn't fun to me. This is my hobby. I save my family money. And I'm good at it. I always try to out-do myself.

Next come my two favorite places. Target and Walmart. Oh my goodness! The deals I have gotten are incredible. i try really hard not to pay full price for anything-ESPECIALLY clothing. I always go straight to the clearance racks/bins/aisles and I always find something that's a score. I usually pay under $4 a piece for clothes for all of us. And I think we dress pretty nice. We may not fit the cover of a fashion magazine, but we always looks clean and presentable. You would be surprised at how low things can be priced at these two stores when they are trying to liquidate their inventory for the season.

I especially love Target because I believe they are higher quality than Walmart and they have their own store coupons which you can stack with manufacturer's coupons. last week I got a fantastic deal on some fruit cups with a Target coupon and a manufacturer's coupon. I paid 24 cents for a four pack. I'm so awesome! I also enjoy some major stores at the mall. The clearance section is great, too!

Tonight I'm headed to Target where they have almost all their toys on clearance at 75% off! They have this "sale" every year and last year I scored big. Tonight I hope to find the items I want and that the selection isn't depleted by the time I get there! I'm soooo excited! I'm totally doing the happy dance right now.

Today's "Happiness Is..." List

2010-07-28T12:49:00.002-04:00

Happiness Is...

Playing with my ipod
Knowing my husband submitted a new job resume! Wahoo!
Having my son call me on his pretend phone and having a whole conversation with me
Enjoying the quiet of the neighborhood
Having a freakishly awesome family....all meant in a good way!
Looking at our family vacation photos over and over and over-just loving them!
Day dreaming
Being healthy
Having gratitude

Happiness is remembering. :-)

Feeling That Confirmation

2010-07-19T13:04:00.003-04:00

I usually try not to post anything religious, because I don't want to be criticized or bashed for my beliefs. Today I am making an exception.

For the most part, I am a happy person. I consistently and genuinely show gratitude to my Heavenly Father for the very many blessings that I have. I know I am unbelievably blessed and, ultimately, successful. But lately there have been obstacles in our life that we haven't been over to overcome, even though we have been fervently trying to do so. We have no doubt that these things will end and the blessings will come, but the never-ending question for us is "when?" There is only so much one can take, you know? I feel that personally I am at a breaking point. But one way or another I feel confirmation from the Spirit that i, indeed, can go on a little longer. You know, one step at a time.

Although I know these things and I have faith that we will be able to change the things we want to change, I personally, have been struggling to feel God's love for me. Specifically. Individually. It's just been a really hard personal, and emotional time for me. I have my ups and downs, and i think I can honestly say that I have more ups than downs. Nonetheless its been difficult for me to overcome these feelings of self-pity and to fully accept that i am a special daughter of God. Although, I have to preface all of this by saying that I have always known these beautiful truths, but in my moments of despair they seem to vanish and no matter how hard I try I can't feel them the way I once did. I've struggled to feel that "fire within" whether in my darkest moment or my happiest.

We have been presented with a choice that we have never considered. We felt the need to seriously pray and think about it. We have been fasting every single Sunday since April. We decided to focus our fast yesterday on this new idea, rather that the one we had previously decided we should pursue. So I was determined to really put my all into this weekend, with thought and prayer, fasting and meditation on the matter.

Sunday morning we went to church and did things just like every other Sunday. The meeting started and everything was just like every other Sunday. As the meeting continued we reached the Rest Hymn (you know, the one after the first speaker, before the second speaker). It was "I Believe In Christ" by Bruce R McConkie. We were standing to sing this one and I was really thinking about the words.

1. I believe in Christ; he is my King!With all my heart to him I’ll sing;I’ll raise my voice in praise and joy,In grand amens my tongue employ.I believe in Christ; he is God’s Son.On earth to dwell his soul did come.He healed the sick; the dead he raised.Good works were his; his name be praised.
2. I believe in Christ; oh blessed name!As Mary’s Son he came to reign’Mid mortal men, his earthly kin,To save them from the woes of sin.I believe in Christ, who marked the path,Who did gain all his Father hath,Who said to men: “Come, follow me,That ye, my friends, with God may be.”
3. I believe in Christ—my Lord, my God!My feet he plants on gospel sod.I’ll worship him with all my might;He is the source of truth and light.I believe in Christ; he ransoms me.From Satan’s grasp he sets me free,And I shall live with joy and love In his eternal courts above.
4. I believe in Christ; he stands supreme!From him I’ll gain my fondest dream;And while I strive through grief and pain,His voice is heard: “Ye shall obtain.”I believe in Christ; so come what may,With him I’ll stand in that great day When on this earth he comes again To rule among the sons of men.

I cannot begin to describe the feelings of peace and powerful confirmation that He lives and He loves me. Me, individually, specifically. There was no denying it. This was the confirmation I had been seeking. Verses 3 and 4 were the most powerful for me. In a large congregation where we were all singing the same hymn, I still felt such a private moment of communication with my Father in Heaven through the Holy Spirit. It was so powerful and I am ever thankful for that sweet moment.

We aren't alone. He loves us and He sent His Son to show us the way back to Them. Here is a video if you want to listen to this hymn. And if you would like to learn more about what I believe in, please visit this website.

Almost 80...

2010-07-06T13:20:00.002-04:00

That's how many blogs I follow. Almost 80.

Family members' blogs, food blogs, crafty blogs, sewing blogs and fashion blogs (not that I'm super fashionable or anything like that). Anyway, one of my fellow bloggers gave me a blog award (not that I deserve it-sine I don't post as often as I would like)! What you do when you get an award is you give one back to your fave blogs. Its pretty hard to choose just a few, but here I go!

And the "I heart your blog" award goes to...(in no particular order)

If you look at my profile page you can see all the blogs that I follow. They are all awesome! If they weren't, I wouldn't follow them!

Benny Bear

2010-05-28T08:41:00.007-04:00

Benny made me a Mommy. He arrived 3 years ago today. I still prefer his tantrums over the contractions. :-) He has grown so much, and he has turned out to be more than I could have imagined. He's perfect. He is so sweet, and so smart. He's a great big brother. He's my little guy!

He was always the happiest baby around!He was also very good at bonking his head. Actually, he's still good at it.

Happy, even though he had a hurt arm.

HAPPY 3rd BIRTHDAY, BENNY BEAR!

The Prince of Darkness

2010-05-27T13:08:00.002-04:00

We watch several dramas on CBS. One of those is Criminal Minds, which had its Season Finale yesterday. We recorded it and watched it later that night. The episode was all about this psycho who would get inside a house during a black-out (they were in LA and there were scheduled rolling black-outs) and kill (among other things). The media in the city nicknamed him "The Prince of Darkness." The last home he broke into, he turned the power off for himself. It was a creepy episode, as are most of them.

It was really late and we had already started watching the next show's (CSI: NY) season finale. We were sitting in the living room, just the two of us. Everyone else was asleep. Then everything goes black. Yes. All the electricity is gone. Benny instantly starts screaming, crying, and yelling. My handy cell phone is used for light as I go to the trusty MagLite. I get to Benny and start explaining what was happening and I couldn't help but look out the window. I saw that everything was pitch-black outside, too. Then the lights came back on. Then, a few minutes later they went off again. And finally back on again.

It was so creepy! I couldn't help but look everywhere-out the window, the corners of the rooms, the ceiling...
Then, Ben and I sat on the couch to resume our season finale and we were talking about what had just happened. We joked that we wouldn't put it past CBS to pay for brown-outs in select viewing areas late at night to cause extra creepiness for their show. Either way, we can't wait for next season!

Mother's Day Gift

2010-05-10T11:49:00.002-04:00

I finally got it! I finally got what i have wanted for so long! About 7 years were spent wishing and hoping and not being able to afford or justify the expense of what I wanted. But once again, my wonderful husband Ben surprised me with a wonderful gift!

Isn't it beautiful?! *Sigh* It's Phenomenal! I can't wait to use it!

Appreciation

2010-05-04T12:02:00.002-04:00

Today has already proven to be a tough day for me-emotionally. But whatever, I'm trying to get out of this rut and move forward. It can be done. I've done it before, I can do it again. Along with my personal drama to deal with I have lots of loads of laundry to deal with. But I guess I have to let you in on the secret that I actually really enjoy doing laundry. So its not a biggie, but it does take up a lot of time to get done.

As I was sitting on Benny's bed this morning I was thinking about how I was going to gather the energy to get the day started with breakfast, then laundry and possibly a trip to the park or a walk around the neighborhood (and many other things that should get done today). Benny was sitting by my feet putting together his train tracks.

He looked up at me and said "Mommy, are you gonna play with me?" I said yes to him, thinking that it probably wouldn't be for very long since I had so much to get done today.

He then chuckled lightly and said "I appreciate it!"

I can't help but smile and be grateful for the blessings that I already do have. It was a boost for my heavy day, and a reminder to be grateful for the present day.

What's goin' on?

2010-04-30T12:31:00.002-04:00

Things in the Queendom are surely not the way I thought they'd be right now. You make plans for something but things don't always turn out the way you plan. Melodrama is not intended, but things are just so hard for me, personally, right now. Have I mentioned before that patience is not my virtue? Because, trust me. It is not!

I want to be in my own home again. Not the house we own out of state, but a new place where we can establish our own household again and call home. Just the four of us. Just us. And the dog. Just us.

I want to use my own things again. My dishes, and pots and pans. My silverware, my cool craft stuff, my towels and my blankets. I want to use my own washing machine and dryer. And oddly, I want to use my own computer again, too. I'd love to have all my great picture frames hanging on walls that I walk by every day. I want to establish the normality I once knew. I have a state of normal now, but its a new one created to fit this situation. It works for us, but its not our ultimate goal for our state of being.

In a month and a few days it will be one whole year since we moved here. I thought that we would have been in our own place months ago. But it isn't so. And I know that things happen for a reason. I'm not saying that this isn't where we should be, but its just frustrating. Its frustrating to want something that's righteous, but not be able to have it yet for reasons that you don't understand.

Again, no melodrama intended. I'm a pretty happy person. I just needed to vent and validate my feelings in a "public" sort of way. It makes it more real for me and I will be able to cope with it on a less "surreal" way.

As a side note, my parents officially retire today! A celebration has been planned. :-D

To post or not to post?

2010-04-23T08:57:00.002-04:00

Its been a long week, but yet, also a short one. It's been one of those weeks, I guess. The days are meshed together; I'd have to look at the Guide on the TV to tell you what the date was; and the days have been moving ever so slowly that it makes me want to scream.

But all in all, its been a good week. I often see things or do things or having things happen and I think "Oh! This is blog-worthy! I should totally blog about this!"
and. then. i. forget.

So today I'll share something small that happened to me yesterday. I was preparing dinner early in the day and had been cutting us some vegetables. So I diced the aromatic tomatoes and then moved on the lettuce. As I moved the thinly sliced lettuce into the serving bowl I saw that my finer was bleeding and I had a long cut! I instantly had the thought, something to the effect: Oh no! I cut myself and its a bad one! Its gonna hurt real bad! When did I cut myself? i didn't even feel it! (You know, something like that in a split second)

So as I more closely examined the damage I had caused I realized that I simply had a long piece of tomato skin that had stuck to my finger. I laughed at myself and said "This would be a lame post if I blogged about it."

But since I couldn't remember any of the cool things I had come up with...
LoL Yeah, it's been that kind of a week!

Choco-Friday

2010-03-12T11:34:00.005-05:00

Its Friday!! I'm so happy for the weekend!
Being Friday, the start of the weekend I thought I would celebrate with my munchkins this morning. At the Queendom (although its not feeling very Royal lately) we very rarely have sugary cereal, nor do we hardly ever buy chocolate milk. Well, on a whim I decided to buy a chocolatey-sweet cereal that was on clearance at Target and earlier in the week I bought some Nesquik milk (it makes me think of my childhood so fondly).

{cereal image source} {banana image source}

So for breakfast this morning we had our usual banana (I think the boys' world would explode if they didn't have a banana for breakfast everyday) and I busted out the chocolate milk! Now Benny has only had chocolate milk once in his life and it was while we still lived in Indiana; it was roughly a year ago. He didn't like it at all! So I wondered if his palette would appreciate the smooth chocolatey taste from the milk. Ezra has never had chocolate milk, either. So off went the experiment. I gave Benny his cup of milk (not a sippy cup, thankyouverymuch) in a brand new spiderman cup that I bought at Target, too. Ezra used a big-boy sippy cup with no stopper.

Not to my surprise the boys LOVED the chocolate milk. They were then offered some of the choco-goodness cereal and of course, they loved that, too. For lunch we will have some chocolate caramels as a small dessert after we eat the real food. Hehehehe... After dinner we'll have some chocolate, too. Just because today is Choco-Friday at the Queendom!

{milk image source}

Every once in a while we need these kinds of treats; I know it creates fun memories, even though they probably won't remember these that are so early on. But still. It convinces me that I am a cool mom. :o)

{spidey cup image source}

Family Rocks

2010-03-01T12:29:00.003-05:00

As I sat here trying to decide what to write about I was thinking of the many happenings of the past week. Should I write about the crazy Walmart purchase that took us forever to figure out how to open? Should I write about the boys screaming happily? Should I write about the horrendous amounts of snow that we got?
Then I looked up above the computer monitor, at the wall behind and saw the fancy letter stickers that were placed there. The shine in the light. My sister placed them there about a month or so after we moved in with her. The stickers spell out Family Rocks. There is a pretty crown above the words and I told her that she put it there just for me. So bear with me as I indulge myself with a totally selfish post.

My parents (all four of them) are beyond wonderful. The love and support they have offered us is priceless. Emilia, Wilbert, and Beryle and Ed. My in-laws are awesome.
My siblings and siblings-in-law are my closest friends. Aime, and even Willie, Paul, Anna, Jeff, Aubrey, Brad, Liz, Ashante, Becca, Dave, Rachael, Eddie and Kelly. The conversations and advice, the love and support can never be replaced.

My nieces and nephews are such great kids! I love them so very much. They made me an aunt! Jonah, Drew, Jacob, Sam, Caleb, David, Norah, Leah, Heidi, Alicia, Kimani, and even Jamie...hehehe

And my immediate little family. You guys rock! Ben, Benny, Ezra and Smoochie. Perfection.
Family Rocks!

Happiness Is...

2010-02-24T10:45:00.002-05:00

One of my very first posts on my first blog was titled "Hapiness Is..." I think those are some of my favorite blog entries because when I go and read them I am reminded of small simple things that really made me happy. They now make me smile and fill me with the warmth that only sweet memories can bring. So, in honor of those awesome blog entries...

Happiness is hearing my two little boys play and interact with eachother even though one of them doesn't talk yet.

Happiness is looking at my husband's beard and feeling triumphant that he finally grew one out!

Happiness is knowing that we all are healthy and safe.

Happiness is sitting on the couch under a warm blanket after a crazy hectic week and vegetating in front of the massively huge TV (which doesn't belong to us) while the boys nap. Seriously, this is happy stuff!

Happiness is be able to drop the boys off with grandparents so we can go off into the night for a fun date!

Happiness is finally having all of your tax stuff so you can mail it out to get done!!

Happiness is seeing the joy on my sons' faces when daddy gets home after a long day at work.

Happiness is finally having a SuperWalmart (even though its not advertised as such) relatively near.

Happiness is watching my little Ezra walking down the hall way.

Happiness is having Benny scare me while he roars like a dinosaur.

Happiness is knowing that I'm truly happy right now!

Teaching

2010-02-04T00:39:00.002-05:00

I have been a teacher many times before. I've taught younger kids while I was in middle school, and high school during teacher's aide's assignments and extra-curricular things of the like. I have taught many classes as a teacher in Church. This is not a new thing to me.

Tomorrow I will teach my first pre-school lesson to a class of about 2 or 3, my son Benny included. I am not nervous, but I am a little anxious. I hope I can be a good teacher for him. I want to be the best teacher I can for him. I hope that I can help him learn everything he needs to be successful in life.

I hope he'll think of me as a good teacher when he gets older.

Closer to our goal

2010-01-11T14:23:00.002-05:00

I know I have slacked and not written in a while. Things have been crazy busy.

But I have news.

We found renters!

Yipeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!

We're off to good ol' Indiana for the weekend to sign a lease and visit family.

Pictures will follow.

I promise!

Ezra's Birthday Celebration

2009-11-30T01:34:00.009-05:00

Here is the birthday boy! Ezra is such a happy little guy!

Cupcakes are so fun!

And here's Ezra's birthday cake with the family tradition happily being continued. For the 1st birthday its always chocolate cake, with chocolate frosting and m&ms. Ice cream is a part of the deal, too!

The Birthday Prince!

Getting ready to have cake and ice cream!

Party Hat!

Happy Birthday To You!

What's this? Is it all for me?!

Oh man, this is gooooood!

The party hat is ruining everything! Take it off!

Much Better!!!!

Big Brother Benny

Friend Paul

Friend Carter

Cousin Heidi

Cousin Caleb

Cousin Sam

It was a great birthday celebration. I just can't believe my little baby is already 1 year old!

3 weeks in a row...what's the deal?

2009-10-08T12:00:00.003-04:00

Since we moved we no longer have DVR. We probably won't (unless my sister and brother-in-law decide to get it) until we move into our own place. So for right now, we use VHS tapes and the VCR to record our shows. Season Premier week arrived and we made mental notes to record the shows we wanted to watch. That first week on Wednesday we went to the store in the evening and half way through our grocery shopping I realized I never set the VCR. We thought no biggie because we can watch the show online.

We try to watch the show a couple of days later and they only have highlights of the episode of this one show we really like. Grrrr... So we decide that we'll watch the highlights and just wait for next week.

The following week the same thing happens, but we get home in time to record the last half of the show. So we watch the highlights for the first half and then watch the rest on the VHS tape. Double Grrrr...

Then yesterday we set an alarm on our phones so we wouldn't forget to record the shows. We started recording an hour early and then decided to run to the store to get something we had run out of. We get home excited that we're going to finally watch our shows and as soon as we get inside I realize that the VCR is recording. Why? Well, right before we left for the store our block had a blackout for like a few seconds. When the power came back on the VCR reset itself or whatever and didn't continue recording. We didn't even realize it before we left!! If we had noticed, I could have hit the record button and all would have been well.

Three weeks in a row. Triple Grrrrrrs. Now we'll be left with highlights again and hopefully the other show that comes after will be available online (we've always managed to either watch the second show live or actually catch it on the recording).

I miss DVR!

I am SuperMom without the supernatural powers

2009-09-24T09:47:00.002-04:00

I love taking care of my family. I love being the wife and mother. I honestly love doing the things that need to be done in order for our family's needs to be met.

cooking
cleaning
bathing kids
dishes
laundry-all steps
paying bills
diaper duties

Despite the happiness I find in these tasks 9and others not mentioned), I also wish that sometimes, just sometimes, I could snap my fingers, or wrinkle my nose or tap my feet AND IT WOULD ALL GET DONE in the blink of an eye.

I enjoy these things. I find them entertaining at times and definitely fulfilling. I can feel my love pouring out onto the things I do, because I know that this helps my family's needs. But I need a break sometimes. I guess its only human.

If it were possible, today would be filled with snaps, wrinkles or taps.

Definitely!

But alas! No Such Luck...

My Husband, My Therapist

2009-09-16T11:27:00.004-04:00

For a while now I have had some closure issues about an ex-boyfriend. This relationship wasn't terribly serious, but it was one of the hardest break-ups in all of my history. I have finally understood why it was so hard-I was always the one to break-up and never the one who was broken-up with. This guy broke my heart and I couldn't understand why he didn't want me. He seemed to still care about me, but he just didn't want to be with me. I struggled with this for years. My pride was severely bruised. I was a vulnerable teenager who "loved" so fiercely and then from one day to the next it was all over. Typical female teenager.

This is one thing that has bothered me continuously since the break-up and I haven't been able to formulate any type of closure. I mean, it would even haunt me in my dreams. How pathetic is that? I would always mention this to Ben and he would always assure me that it was ok, and that I didn't have to worry. Sooner or later it would get too old and it would stop bothering me. This was not the case. I would briefly talk about it with my sister and sisters-in-law to de-stress about it, but it was still there. I was always shy to bring it up in depth with Ben, because after all, it was an ex-boyfriend.

A couple of weeks ago I gave in and just spilled everything out to Ben, just because I needed to vent about it so badly. Why was this bothering me so much, even still, after so many years? (Remember, Ben and I have been together for like 9 years and married for 7).

Ben became my therapist. Seriously. He told me things that I had never thought of. He explained things from a guy's perspective that I had never considered. He comforted me in a way that no one had ever been able to about this situation. He truly gave me closure. He helped me understand. I mean, that sums it all up. I understand now. Of course, it would be great if I could hear some of those things from the jerk that broke my teen heart, but that ain't gonna happen. If I had the opportunity to run into him in the street he wouldn't have the guts to even talk to me. Coward. Even on Facebook he is a coward.

I can let go of my hurt and baffle now. I wish I would've talked about it sooner with Ben. Good Riddance!

Date Nights

2009-09-14T12:19:00.002-04:00

I remember hearing time and time again as I was a teenager and a young adult that it is important for couples to have a date night-weekly, if possible. As I searched the LDS.org archives for talks with this admonition, I didn't quite find what I was looking for, but I did find some other great ideas. There were articles form the Ensign with inexpensive date night ideas that can be held at home. I thought it would be a great idea! And then I remembered we don't live in our own place and it just wouldn't work the same way.

We have been thinking a lot about date nights lately. We feel that we've gotten to the point where we really do NEED to get away from the kids at least once a week, if we can manage. We've been married for 7 years and we have two little boys. It can be stressful. On top of that we don't have the same dynamic at home that we used to. We're never alone (with the kids) at the house, really. And we don't talk as freely as we used to, because there are some things you just don't want other people hearing and so they don't get said until its bedtime and we're alone in our bedroom. Other times, we forget to tell things to one another because threes always someone else to talk to, so its not a one on one thing anymore. I don't know if any of this makes sense, but in my head it does. Anyway, date nights have become our exclusive time to talk about anything and not worry about what the kids are doing or who's gonna make a comment about what we're talking about.
But all of this is a little more complicated. Its not just a date night that I personally crave, but its more of a date night with a purpose/occasion. I want to dress up and look nice. Not just-jeans and a t-shirt. NJ is so very different that Indiana in that respect. Everyone is more aware of what they look like. I know people would cringe out here if they knew that so many people go grocery shopping in their pajamas. lol So I think I just want that back. Before I moved away I was like that-I would look my absolute best to go to the simplest place. Now that I'm back, I want to be like that again. I had forgotten how good it feels. I want to feel like a woman again, and not just a mommy when I go out.

I had been so desperate for this that last weekend that we splurged and went on 2 dates. On Saturday night we dropped the kids off at my parents' at about 10:30pm and then we were off to find a place to eat something. When we had no luck (because by this point it was already 11pm) and ended up driving around for like 30 minutes, we decided to go catch a late show at the movies. It was nice, but it wasn't what I wanted. You can't talk during a movie. So the next night we had my parents watch the kids again and we got all dressed up and went to New York City. We didn't do anything major. All we did was walk around and look at the lights and the people. The train ride was about 30 minutes and we had a great time just talking.
It was what I needed though. It was perfection.

We're coming up with a list of date ideas that we want to do. One of our next dates will be a nice dinner someplace new and at the top of our list is dancing. We went clubbing at Webster hall in NYC a few years ago and we had a great time, except it was a little raunchy. So we're looking into where else we can go. We love to dance and if you know me at all, you know I LOVE club music! So, hopefully we'll get to do that soon.
What do you like to do for your dates? Do you have any suggestions for us? Any insights? Double date invitations are welcome, too. :-)

Where has this year gone?!

2009-09-05T09:56:00.002-04:00

Our bathroom is on the second floor and we have a big window in the shower. The view, in my opinion is beautiful. All you see (if the window is open, because its a frosted window) are trees and leaves and sky. When I shower, I love to look out the window. Its almost as if I'm in the trees.

This morning as I was in the shower I was looking out the window and I noticed some "bunches" of something colored red. I was very curious what in the world it could be so I kept observing...

There are red leaves on the trees!

Can you believe that? Already!

This year has flown by thus far. Its been a great one, though. Full of many different experiences. I know next year will be even better! But for now, I will be enjoying the cooler, fresher weather and anticipating the beautiful colors of fall.

my stuff

2009-08-19T13:27:00.003-04:00

I've been thinking a lot about what life will be like when we live in our own place here in NJ. Will I miss my sister's house?
Ben and I went to the garage yesterday and reorganized it. We were able to move everything so that there was actually empty space in there for things that had been left outside (i.e. the lawn mower, bikes, etc.). We had to look through boxes, too, so we could get things out that we needed. We mostly got clothes and toys. I also found a big box full of brand new cleaners and also a plastic tub full of toilet paper. :-) Of course you know I paid barely anything for all of those things. When we finally got the garage the way we wanted it and brought everything inside that was coming in I looked through the things that we've been using and packed some of it up to take out to the garage. So I swapped some boxes, basically. But now we have a lot more things that we wanted to use.

As I stood outside on the lawn looking into the garage I realized how "poor" I felt. I dunno, its weird. It's just so bizarre knowing that most of what you own (including irreplaceable things) is right there, in front of you. That's all we own. Everything. We have some things inside, but the vast majority is right there. It just seemed like it should be more, I guess.
I thought about how we are living right now. We only have bare essentials. Most of those essentials belong to my sister, too; they're not even ours. Why? Because they're all still packed. lol
This experience has really taught me to live with less. Its ok to live with less. Its ok not to have a lot of things. Actually, its kinda nice. Its made me evaluate the things that truly make me happy. And stuff really isn't one of those things.

But I do have to say that it will be AWESOME to be able to use all my stuff again.

::Insert witty title here::

2009-08-12T12:32:00.002-04:00

I REALLY need to get pictures up....so sorry people...I promise 'll get it done soon.

Its still a little surreal that we're living in Jersey. For me, anyway. We have adjusted really well, I think. We have our routines down and we have settled in fairly quickly. We have callings at church and we enjoy them. We like our ward, and we especially like how close the church is to our home. We've made some really great friends who seem to like us just as much as we like them (but that may be because they also had no friends before we got here. So we're lucky for that, because if they had more to choose from we probably wouldn't be their friends...lol) and Benny also has great new buddies to play with.

We're getting familiarized with the area-Ben much more than I, because he's good like that and I'm not. :-P We have preferences for what stores we shop and when we shop. This week we had some checks to deposit to the bank (guess what bank we bank with) and Ben didn't have time to do it before he left for work, so I thought I'd venture out with the boys to deposit them. I printed walking directions on google maps and even with that I got lost once. LOL And it was only like 6 blocks away. I went the wrong direction from the house, but I quickly realized it and turned around. We have a beautiful neighborhood. I really need to take pictures to show you all. I then went to the library, which is closer to the house than the bank. Its a cute little branch that mostly has children's books, which was cool. They have a baby story hour which every librarian in the place told me about and seemed excited that they would have another baby coming (as if I had signed a contract saying I would definitely be there...lol). It was a great walk. I loved it. Benny slept most of the way, and Ezra slobbered all over his Snuggli...lol

I didn't think I would like it here (the town) as much as I do! I hope that we can find a house in our budget here(as soon as we no longer have the Lafayette mortgage). I think we will.

Patience and Faith...
Trials in these categories never seem to cease....hehehehe

Aimless Post

2009-08-11T12:38:00.003-04:00

Would you believe I looked up a synonym for "random?" I didn't want to use it again in my title...lol

The corner of my eye hurts...by my tear duct, sorta. :-( Not cool.

Its hecka hot again today. Despite this fact, I still would like to go on another walk today. We'll see if that happens. I still have some laundry to finish.

I've been thinking a lot about church and about some changes that are coming. I'm excited to get to work on the nursery rooms, too!

We are having a family rent our house for a month. I hope that they can recommend it to someone else they know that might be going out there. Another little funny fact about them-the house that they are moving into (that won't be ready when they get there, hence our house being rented) is on the same street as my sister and brother-in-law, the Drakes.

I really enjoy getting mail. Even if its junk mail. teehee

I think that Maplewood is really snobby. To the point where its sometimes ridiculous how snooty these people are. But I secretly love it!!!

I have an awesome coupon for $15 off my next shopping order at the grocery store. We forgot to use it last week, so I'm excited to use it this week.

Even though we're trying not to buy junk food there is still junk food in the house. Paul really likes soda and REALLY LOVES oreos. Ugh...the temptation is so bad. We share all our food, so since I know its OK for me to have some, I do... How terrible! But I'm cutting back. And its helping with my self discipline.

We got a booklet in the mail yesterday for adult classes for our town and a neighboring town. Some of them sound so fun! There's a knitting class, a cooking class, fitness classes, painting classes, foreign languages, glass blowing, dancing classes....the list goes on. I would really like to take one. Some of them are really expensive (for my budget, anyway) others aren't so bad. I think it would be really fun to take one! We'll see...

I know we don't have any sort of prospect for moving out of my sister's house any time soon, but I've been thinking about what that will be like. Its exciting to think that "someday" I can use my own dishes, pots & pans, TVs, towels, picture frames, furniture, closets, fridge, etc. and its also exciting to think that I will be able to decorate my home (you all know that I live for that) and to get to do all these things that I'm sure all of you take for granted. :-) But I can't shake the feeling that I think it will be very sad to move out. We're a family now (I mean, we were family to begin with, but its different now). We have dinner together, we make plans together, we share times that were only shared when we would come to visit and we'd stay here. I hope that they feel glad that we're here. I know that for me, its very bitter sweet.

Enough rambling! I've got stuff to do! :-)

Shopping. Saving. Cutting. Money. Goals.

2009-08-04T12:19:00.005-04:00

I am still shocked at how expensive things are here in Jersey. A lot of things are comparable, but a lot are also a lot more than they are in Indiana. I am still doing my couponing, which is saving us money every time we shop. But honestly, it's still not saving us as much money. Perhaps this expectation, of spending close to the same amount of money on groceries was naive of me. Perhaps I'm just crazy and thought we could be spending similarly, considering the fact that there are Walmarts and Targets here.
We only have a Walmart, no SuperWalmart. We also don't have any Super Targets. The prices at these two stores are pretty much the same as they are in Indiana, but they don't carry all of the things that we normally would buy there. Walmart is a little inconvenient to get to and its also kinda ghetto, so we only go there about once every 2 or 3 weeks. Only when we've run out of something that we can get there for a good price. Target is much closer and MUCH nicer. There is a new one that opened just a couple of miles away and we really enjoy shopping there.
As far as grocery stores go I shop the sales! (of course, right? lol) I have a couple of stores that I regularly keep track of their sales and they are close together, so we can stop at both during the same trip. Coupons are doubled up to 99cents, so that's a great deal! But coupons are worth less here. The paper will have a coupon for something like 20cents off a package of wipes, whereas in IN I know the coupon would be for 30 or maybe even 50cents off.
We're doing pretty well, though, with grocery shopping. We only go to the store once a week, as opposed to several trips per week to wallyworld when we lived in IN. We've started cutting out junk food (which is pretty expensive here) and getting more fruits and veggies. I was looking at some receipts and we've spent close to $50 on junk food for the last month (chips, cookies, candy) so we decided we need to cut those things out, because we really don't need them. They're kinda just sitting there in the cupboards. We also don't eat out at all. Ben has lost 5lbs.! We're maintaining about $100-$115 a week for groceries (including junk food). So imagine how much more we could be saving if we got rid of the junk! We can do it!
My goal is to cut out more off our grocery bill. Thus far, I have been saving between 40 to 50% off my total bill. I want to increase it and I think I can. I just need to familiarize myself a little bit more with stores and sales here. I also think we're gonna split a membership to Costco with my sister (she needs to renew hers).
What's your take on my shopping drama?

Don't cry over spilt milk

2009-08-03T12:41:00.002-04:00

Benny has this fascination for spitting liquids out of his mouth. As it turns out, its usually milk. On good days it'll be water. There is a part of the dining room floor that I can assure you is always clean. Why? Because I clean it up practically every day and sometimes twice a day.

After he spits the milk onto his tray he then swishes it around with his hands and makes it splash all over the floor and sometimes even the wall. It usually lands on the coffee table in the living room, too.

After I finished my last post I went downstairs to get him out of his chair. I looked at him and was so pleased that he had finished his food and hadn't made a mess. He didn't even have milk dribble over his shirt! I was proud of him at that moment. I walked to the kitchen to get a washcloth to clean him up (he had had yogurt and that was a bit messy on his face). All I did was grab the washcloth, rinse it in warm water and walk back into the living room and there was milk EVERYWHERE!

I'm so frustrated with this. It happens so often. It even happens if we're in the room with him. He calls it spit-up...I think he might do it because he sees Ezra spit up his milk and we don't say anything to Ezra. I don't know, though. Maybe he's just a little turd....lol
I don't know how to stop this behavior. We go over it time and time again. We explain that we don't spit and it just doesn't seem to work.

Today however, I tried something different. I immediately took him out of his chair and stood him in front of the stairs for a time-out while I cleaned up the milk. I then gave him the rag and told him to go clean up his mess (after I had done most of it). He sat there on the floor in just his diaper and scrubbed a few times. Poor little guy, I wanted to pick him up and tell him that I would always clean up his messes...lol...I'm such a softy. But I didn't! I moved him over to the middle of the "mess" and told him to clean it up some more there, too. At that point he looked up at me and smiled; it seemed he was starting to enjoy it. lol So I ended it there, because this wasn't going to turn into a game.

I hope this tactic will work. Maybe if he participates in the consequences he won't want to do it anymore.

Any insights?

2009-08-03T12:21:00.003-04:00

Oh, dear blogworld, I have not forgotten thee.
I've just been really busy and a tad lazy to blog...lol

Things here in Jersey are going great. We've done some fun things and have begun to have our own routine. Hopefully we'll be able to do something about our house so that we can be in our own place soon, too. That'll be the icing on the already yummy cake.

We've taken pictures (not many) that we need to upload to the computer so I can post them here and on our Family Website. I've got to remind Ben to get to it so I can post them.

Anyway, Benny is a mess and Ezra is screaming....this is common, but they need tending to...

I promise to have a better blog soon!!

Wowza

2009-05-09T02:16:00.002-04:00

Holy flying cats! I can't believe the things that have happened. I feel like I can finally be open about certain feelings that I've had about certain situations we've been going through. Finally.

We're finally moving. Ben was fired.

Its a bit scary, but for the most part I am so incredibly excited and happy that we finally get to take this leap. I'm so very grateful for all the people that prayed for us and fasted with us and those who gave of their time to help us and give us advice and comfort us when we were in our deepest moments of despair in this situation.

We have now begun our own boycott against McDonald's. They no longer can try to dictate our lives. Hallelujah!

Maybe now we can break free of their evil toxins, too. It will be all too soon when we step foot in a McDs. I think we'll easily lose a few pounds, too. hehehe

I'm just glad that this is over. I'm glad that this stress is gone. I'm thankful that it came to a head and we now know what we have to do.

But now we're focusing on packing and planning...I'm so excited! For the time being I'm excited, but I know that leaving Indiana will be one of the hardest things I'll ever do. I may never be a Hoosier, but I sure do love this place.

Our hearts will always hold such a special place for this great state. But I really am excited to be back in the East Coast and close to my side of the family again.

Everything is going to turn out great. We're remembering that our future is only as bright as our faith!
And yes, in case you're wondering I did have a little too much fun working on this post...hehehehe

Double Take on the Calendar

2009-05-01T13:25:00.002-04:00

Holy Cow! Its already May?! I can't believe it! It seems like last week Ezra was born and then the year started! I love May! This month Ben and I will have been married for 7 years and Benny will turn 2 years old. May is also the month that my sister celebrates her birthday, my brother in law Eddie celebrated his birthday and his daughter Heidi also turns 2 years old. My parents also celebrate their wedding anniversary this month.

May brings warmer weather, sunnier days and ultimately the preparations for SUMMERTIME! Yeah!

I love May...what a great month! And before you know it, June will be here, too! So enjoy your May!

My venting post

2009-04-28T23:43:00.002-04:00

I haven't had a chance to blog...it seems that when I get a chance to get on the computer long enough to blog, its late and the typing worries me that I'll wake one of the boys up. Anyway...here I am almost midnight, blogging about nothing.

But nothing really is what I want to blog about. Nothing. Nothing is happening. Nothing seems to be changing.

Well, that's not true. Things are changing but not the way I expected. Its not bad, I guess, but its not what I thought.

Nothing is happening.

We still haven't found new employment, we still haven't...
the list could go on but I am determined to be positive. So I just needed to vent for a minute and then I'll be better.

The end.

Too Much TV

2009-04-15T23:22:00.002-04:00

I have been thinking lately about how much TV we watch. We feel that we should maximize how much we watch since we pay for satellite and DVR. We really get our money's worth I think, but I question whether we are watching the best shows we can watch. There are many great dramas and comedies out there, but there are also some that are on the border of not-so-good-tv. You know what I mean?

I need to evaluate my TV hours. What do I eliminate? I LOVE TV!!! But I'm sure we'll be able to cut back. This move to Jersey will help kick start our goal. lol

Any suggestions?

This weekend

2009-04-01T23:30:00.001-04:00

I'm so stressed out. I am so anxious for General Conference! I am hoping that I will find much needed strength and guidance within the inspired words of our Prophet and General Authorities. I can't wait!

Tender Mercy

2009-03-18T22:54:00.003-04:00

Its interesting how bad things can strengthen one's faith and hope. This week thus far has been crazy and one of trials.

Benny was having a tantrum of sorts because he didn't want his diaper changed and was kicking his legs. I moved a bottle of milk that was on the "table" part of the changing table on to the TV right next to it and in that split second Benny fell off the changing table.
It was horrible! He had x-rays taken at Urgent Care and the doctor preliminarily determined that he had a fracture on his clavicle. We later took him the Pediatrician and she sent us to get a cat scan because she feared he had a fracture on his skull due to a little blood she found behind his eardrum. So off we went to the ER (it was after hours) and he had the scan. The radiologist said there was no fracture.
We were relieved that he only had a fracture on his collar bone-that was less scary than a fracture on his head! He slept pretty well with his sling on and seemed to be in better spirits. We prayed and thanked Heavenly Father for this trial, because it helped us strengthen our testimony of the Atonement, and it reminded us that we aren't alone.
The following day we got a phone call from the doctor that saw him at Urgent Care. She said that the Radiologist had finally looked at the x-rays taken of his clavicle and he determined that there were no fractures!
NO FRACTURES! ANYWHERE!
It was truly a miracle. It strengthened our testimonies even more. It was something awful, but we are grateful for Heavenly Father's tender mercies. It truly was a tender mercy.

I love my house

2009-03-09T09:59:00.003-04:00

We have someone interested in our house. The woman wanted information on the dimensions and price and taxes, etc. of the house. I delayed giving her this info (all through email) for about a week. I was so nervous that I would say the wrong thing, or that she just wouldn't be interested anymore. I finally felt like I just had to do it. If she wasn't going to like it, then that would be that. Plus, she can't really make that decision unless she has the info on the house, right? Anyway, I looked at our mortgage papers to get info on the assessment and stuff and I had flashbacks of signing these papers and looking at the house for the first time. I remember those feelings of wanting the house and thinking that it wasn't perfect, but that it was what we could totally work with. I also thought about the day we moved in. I remembered the first night we slept here! We had our mattresses on the floor and boxes all around us in the bedroom. I thought about painting all the rooms and putting pictures on the walls and curtains over the windows. We were first time homeowners and we loved it! We were so proud of our little house!

Now I think about selling this place. I love it so much, yet I'm so desperate to sell it and have it be out of our hands. Its funny that way, isn't it? I think about leaving it behind and it makes me all choked up inside. I really do love this place, but I know our time here has come to an end. We need to sell so we can move. We can't afford two mortgages, so we have to say goodbye to our first home. I really hope that this woman and her husband are still interested. I hope they think its a deal what we're asking for. I hope they decide to buy it right away. I'm nervous about hearing back from her, but I hope I hear back from her really, really soon.

I'm ready and excited to have these same feelings on a new house. I'm ready to put pictures back up on walls that I will call my own. I'm ready to pick out colors and paint again. I'm excited to pull out my packed curtains and put them on new windows. I can't wait to decorate my boys' room(s). I don't know what our new house will look like, but it will be wonderful for us. Of that I'm sure!

untitled blog post

2009-03-05T23:27:00.003-05:00

Time has been short lately. I haven't had the time to do all that I want, but I have had the time to do all that I need, which is good. We're going to the Temple on Saturday. I'm very excited. Its been a while since we've gone-the last time we went to the Temple it was in October of last year and it was to the Manhattan Temple. Anyway, we really need this and I can't wait!

This trip to the Temple has made us think about the things that we can improve in our lives. We are beginning to evaluate what we watch on TV. There are so many things that we are just desensitized to that we don't realize we shouldn't allow such things in our home. I think about our kids and I just don't want them to think that certain things are normal, because they see it on TV, ya know? It doesn't seem like it will be too big of a deal to stop watching some shows, either. :-) I hope, anyway.

And to end this short and out of place blog, I've lost 5 pounds! Woot Woot!

How does one know?

2009-02-26T10:43:00.003-05:00

I'm feeling a little anxious. There are lots of little things going on in our lives right now while we wait for a couple of big things to come along. We're waiting to hear back from some jobs that Ben has applied to. What are the chances that he'll get called in for an interview? What are the odds that he'll get hired right away? There are so many questions...
I keep myself occupied with normal daily things. I clean the house, I do dishes, I make dinner, I play with Benny, bathe the boys, go to church, watch TV....I mean, the list goes on and on. The point is that I keep myself busy. But while I have this routine of mine I also think a lot about the things to come. When are we finally going to move? When will Ben be hired with a new job? Will be have a short period of time between when we know we're leaving and when we leave?
I worry about other things, too. Will we be able to sell this house? Will we at least be able to rent it? Will we be able to close on a house out there quickly enough so that we don't have to live in an apartment or with family?
I'm a little anxious, too, because I don't know how much longer we'll be here. I thought that by now we would have been gone, but we aren't. So I wonder how much longer we have. I'm happy that we're still here, though. My family means the world to me and it breaks my heart every time I think about leaving them here. I get sad to think about leaving my home. Our children were conceived in this house, Benny learned how to crawl and walk in this house. This was our first house. We also have very dear friends that I am very saddened to leave behind. I'm also very excited to be closer to my parents and to start fresh-with a different house, different ward, different friends, different job. We're excited!

All this being said, I have been having "feelings." I feel that things are going to change soon. March is going to be a determining month. I don't know what will happen in March. I am not sure if we will move in March or if we will simply know when we're moving. Perhaps Ben will get a job offer in March. I don't know. But I have a "feeling." I trust this and begin to agree that its the Spirit. But then I question myself and think that it's not. But then I go back and agree again that indeed it is the Spirit. Ben feels the same way I do about March, so that makes me think even more that perhaps it is the Spirit. How does one know, for sure? I'm afraid to have "hope" and then it all be just my desires. But still...its a "feeling," one that I can't shake.

Time will tell, I suppose...

Better day!!

2009-02-19T11:18:00.002-05:00

Today has been a great day, thus far!! The sun is shining in through all the open blinds in the house. It looks so cheery outside, despite the fierce cold I know is out there. I woke up and did my regular routine-feeding the boys, changing diapers, cleaning up a bit from last night's living room messes, etc. No migraine today! I went downstairs and was determined to work out! Ezra was asleep and Benny was content to come downstairs with me. I worked out for a half hour and it was much easier than the last time. WooHoo!! I am determined to stay hydrated today, too. I know that lack of enough water gives me headaches, too.

I'm going to a "girls night" tonight. Beading and for me, some sewing. I am going to learn how to make the greatest towels ever! Homemade kids' towels with hoodies! I can't wait!! I have been wanting to sew something for a while, but just haven't been able due to time and kids, and stuff of that sort. So tonight I will take advantage and get my sew-on! lol I have many projects that I want to work on, but they are on hold until after we move, since all the materials are packed.

Anyway, its been a great day! I think the rest of the day will be, too! My attitude definitely plays a part in all this!

Yeah!

2009-02-18T22:20:00.002-05:00

It seems like will power plays a large part in my daily life. I can say I don't feel like doing this, or doing that, but wanting something badly enough can make that "laziness" dissipate into something doable.
I felt horrible today, having woken up this morning with a bad migraine. I felt like laying and doing nothing, but I persevered and had a productive day. I did some "yard work," cleaning off of our back deck and taking trash out to the curb along with heavy recycling bins. I also sorted through some stuff in a suitcase, picked up after Benny and even made dinner.
My head has been hurting throughout the day, but it did get better, too. I wasn't able to get all that I wanted to get done today, but I did something, and that's good enough, I suppose. I have to remember that one day won't kill me. Tomorrow will be a new day, full of other opportunities and other events.
Being healthy is definitely my #1 priority right now, so I need to make sure I don't over work myself and make myself feel worse. But I know I'm doing all I can and I know that if I have self discipline, my will power will come to save me! I made great choices today and despite not having a lot of things checked off on today's To Do List, I feel great!

Randomness

2009-02-13T20:56:00.003-05:00

OK! So we are officially starting to live healthier. We've been wanting to lose some weight, but have decided that the right way to do it was to change our habits, and not just diet. So we start on Monday. I'm nervous and excited all at once. Lets see how it goes!

Poor Benny has a terrible diaper rash. Its due to the antibiotics he's taking for his ear infections. Its quite an ordeal to change diapers right now. The nurse I spoke to told me that I have to soak his bum in warm water for 10 minutes with every diaper change and then let it air dry or dry it with a blow dryer. I have been using the blow dryer and when I first turn it on (with every diaper change) Benny freaks out and screams. Then I have to apply A&D ointment and then get him all dressed again. We have a cream/ointment that we have to put on him twice a day, too. Poor little guy. At least he doesn't seem bothered by the rash. He must also think Mommy has gone crazy because he's had so many "baths" in one day. He has LOVED it, though! So much fun! :-)

Ezra has been sleeping on his own for the past 3 nights. I hope it continues! Pumping has also been going well and he's been getting breast milk from a bottle once a day close to every day for the past week. Its been nice for Daddy to help feed Ezra!

One of the houses we've been looking at in Jersey went down another $5000. Maybe it will go down some more!

I have overdue library books! The library even called to remind me-whoops!

I have the new "The Fray" CD and its awesome!

I watched a neat half hour special on Gladys Knight and the Saints United Voices Choir on BYU TV. It made me think back to the time I met Gladys Knight. I was 15 or 16 and she came to church at my branch. She ended up coming to Young Women with us and she shared her conversion story. She was so sweet. She hugged all of us and kissed us. It was an amazing experience.

On Monday the 16th BYU TV is having a special on Janice Kapp Perry on a show called LDS Lives. We have the DVR ready to record it. It made me think of her visit to our stake not too long ago. Ben and I gave her and her husband a ride to church while they were here. They came to our branch to speak and it was just wonderful. It was an unforgettable experience. Benny was only a few months old and Sister Perry held him and kissed him a bunch. :-) She even autographed my "Children's Songbook."

Today has been a good day. A long one, but a good one!

My two little guys...

2009-02-11T14:28:00.003-05:00

Ezra is now 2 months old and Benny is 20 months old. They are my world! Both emotionally and literally-Ben can attest to the latter. lol We badly need some Mommy&Daddy time. Hopefully a child-free date night wil arrive soon!

We finally made it outside!

2009-02-10T23:18:00.002-05:00

The weatherman said it was going to be 68 degrees today. Yesterday, I planned out this great adventure of going to the park and having a picnic. I made sure we had clean clothes ( I was doing like 8 loads of laundry since this morning) and made a yummy lunch consisting of PB&J sandwiches, grapes, goldfish crackers, capri sun and fruit snacks. I packed the lunch, dressed the kids and waited for Ben to get home from work (1pm-ish). We went to a local park, got out of the car and realized it was chillier than expected. As we got to the playground we saw signs that said it was for ages 5-12. We attempted, but very quickly realized Benny was just too young for the playground.

So off we went, back into the car to another park we knew would have what we wanted. Benny threw a fit of course, but we pulled through and arrived a few minutes later. We had fun on the swings and on the slide and even on a horsey that was on a huge spring. Benny seemed to have more fun just walking down the path of the park. I took my camera to take pictures, but was unsuccessful at taking the camera out and actually using it. More to follow on that.

We then walked to a picnic table under a shelter area and we sat down to have our late lunch. Ezra started crying some and Benny fussed, so he sat on Daddy's lap. We really enjoyed our lunch-it was delicious, but we ate very quickly. It was CHILLY! I don't think the weatherman's predictions came to be. It had to be a lot lower, plus it was windy. We made it to the car with pink, runny, and cold noses. The sun started to shine through the cloudy sky as we were making it to the car and I stopped to enjoy some sunlight on my face as I fought the shivers. I was sad at not having taken any pictures, but I was just too cold to get the camera out. The sky wasn't very pretty and our faces were red. The wind was blowing harder than we expected, too. But we needed to get out! We needed to feel like Winter hadn't taken over our lives. Today it was in the lower to mid 60's-tomorrow its supposed to be 59 and rainy. So I'm glad we took advantage of the "nicer" weather today.

It was worth it, though. I can't wait until Spring arrives. I need more sun, more warmth and more fun days at the park with my 3 favorite guys.

chocolates...lol

2009-02-07T02:29:00.002-05:00

this will be funny only if you read my previous "$30,000..." post

my parents are flying to mexico for a wedding in the next week or so. my mom told me that she bought a nice big box of cherry filled chocolates for my cousin Josue. She's going to tell him that they're from Benjamin. lol

I just had to share...

Habitual Behavior

2009-02-04T08:57:00.002-05:00

I was just thinking this morning about the things that we do that are habitual. For example, I "roll" toilet paper onto my hand off of the roll in a particular way and I've been doing it that way since as long as I can remember. I sit at the computer desk a certain way, with my feet crossed and legs folded underneath my chair. I put my pants on one leg at a time, but I always start with my right leg. I button my buttons the same way every time. I even change diapers in a particular way and order-the same way since the very first diaper I changed on Benny. My dishes are washed the same way every time and even the way I wipe the table down is the same.
My point is not that I am a boring person and do things monotonously, because this is not so since I am talking about menial things, things that are done subconsciously. My point is that I am a creature of habit as I'm sure everyone else is, too. I will share one habit that is pretty unique to me, and hopefully you can share one of yours.

When I go to bed at night I take my socks off and put a fresh, clean pair on. In the morning when I wake up I take that pair off and put another fresh, clean one on and then I put my slippers on. I do this every day. Every single day. lol It just makes me feel clean, somehow.
What's your habit?

Before I end, though, I need to share my victory from last night! Ezra slept on his own in his bassinet for 4 hours last night! I finally got to sleep by myself (well, with Ben, but without a baby in my arms!!)

Another post for today...

2009-01-29T13:20:00.003-05:00

I am amazed at the naughty things that Benny does that he is to innocent to realize that they are naughty. Its so cute and so annoying at the same time when you want to say "no-no" but you want to laugh, too. :-)
Last night, while Ben was on his way home from work, I sat on the couch nursing Ezra. Benny was playing in his room. At one point I heard something crash and fall and I thought "Oh no! Benny fell and got hurt!" But when he didn't cry and I heard him continue playing I just assumed a toy had fallen. I continue nursing and watching some TV and I hear this rustling sort of noise in his room. I worried, wondering what non-toy thing he had gotten his hands on and then realized I knew what he had. I assume he was playing with his new chair-its a bean bag filled comfy chair that's low to the ground. The rustling noise I was hearing sounded like the bean bag filling being tossed around...you know, a "swish swish." That was all the noise I could hear from then on...no noises from Benny and no music from other toys.
Ben then got home and I was finished nursing. I got up to take Ezra to the bedroom and walked past Benny's room and looked in to see what he was doing.
He was sitting in a sea of diapers! Diapers ALL OVER the floor in his room! He looked up at me with his eyes clearly saying "Uh-oh"
I tried not to laugh! He got up and handed me a diaper and then said to me "thank you." I then just HAD to laugh! The 'crash' I had heard earlier was the box of diapers falling off the little table and the rustling wasn't bean bag filling, but diapers being pushed around the floor and around him.

But I can't complain. I've taught him well. He knew he had done something wrong, even if it was really cute and when I started singing the clean up song he very quickly picked up the billion diapers on the floor and plopped them back into their box. :)

Blogging

2009-01-29T00:13:00.002-05:00

I always come up with these fabulous topics for blogs during the day. Usually I think of them while I'm nursing or changing a diaper, although the topics aren't related to these tasks. Then when I finally get down here to use the computer I can't remember a single topic. I need to carry around a notepad for my good ideas. Although, that would be a tad bit dorky, considering its just a blog post idea.

Anyway...

Blogging is fun for me. Its relaxing and it even allows me to vent. I wish I had more time to do it. Actually, I probably would do it more often if my computer was upstairs. It would be even easier if I had a laptop! But alas, I do not have either of those circumstances available to me right now.
I remember my first "blog." It was with Xanga (xanga.com). I really enjoyed it and posted just about every day. I added tons of pictures and had so much fun with it. But then Benny was born and I stopped altogether. It became an annoyance more than anything. I then (finally) started a blog here on blogger and I love it. Its different, but I enjoy it more and like the features. Blogger is more common than Xanga among my friends, too, so it works out better for me. I enjoy reading others' blogs, too, even though I don't get around to it as much as I used to. I reckon that this will change as the baby gets older. I'll have more time to do little things like that when he is a little less clingy to me. :-)
Blogging really is fun for me, though. Even if no one reads it. :-)

$30,000 - Immigration stopped us and I fainted!

2009-01-21T16:08:00.004-05:00

My cousin (whom I call my aunt because she is much older than I) shared this story with my parents who of course, in turn shared it with us.

The phone rings at my "aunt's" house in Mexico-its 6pm. My cousin Josue (Josh) picks up the phone and listens to a man tell him something to the effect "What? You don't care to remember family anymore?" and Josue says, "Benjamin, is that you?" The man answers in the affirmative and asks who he's speaking to and my cousin says "its Josue" then the man asks how hes doing and asks "Is you mom there?" So Josue hands the phone over to my aunt and tells her its Ben (which they all call him Benjamin, not Ben-its a Spanish thing).

Aunt: Hi there Benjamin, son, how are you? Whats this that you're calling? Is everything OK?
Man: Of course Auntie, everything is fine. I'm calling to tell you that we're arriving tomorrow! But its a surprise! You can't tell anyone because its a huge surprise!
Aunt: (she gets extremely excited and can't wait to see us and the boys) Oh my goodness, so I can't even tell Gaby (her daughter)?
Man: No, not even Gaby... So what would you like me to bring you?
Aunt: Nothing,nothing! It will be enough to have you here in our presence. We can't wait to see you!
Man: Well, what about Josue? Ask him if he wants anything.

My aunt asks and Josue says he'd like some chocolates filled with sweets. She tells the man.

Man: Will you go pick me up at the airport tomorrow?
Aunt: Of course!! Of course!! So where are you staying?
Man: Well, we were hoping we'd be able to stay with you! You have such a hospitable house.
Aunt: Oh yes, of course you can stay with us! We wouldn't want it any other way!
Man: OK, Auntie, I will call you tomorrow with more details about our arrival and such. Don't forget its a surprise!

They hang up. Later that evening my aunt and my mom have a long telephone conversation and my aunt mentions nothing about this surprise. That same evening my aunt starts to stress out making sure the house is ready for us. She starts to clean massively (since obviously she wasn't expecting company!) and even starts rearranging furniture in the bedrooms. Beds get moved from one room to another so that we can stay in the nicest room and with the biggest bed, since we'll have the boys with us. Desserts get made and even plans for a fancy dinner for the next evening since we'll be there. She tells her husband to clean the car out because they are going to go to the airport the next day to pick someone up. He asks "who?" and she says "its a surprise! I can't tell you!"

The next morning her phone rings and its the man again.

Man: Auntie! I need your help! Immigration has stopped us! I have all these presents that I'm bringing for everyone and some money, too, and they've stopped me because of it. Listen, here's the lawyer that's helping us out. he'll tell you everything.

So the lawyer tells my aunt that we were stopped because we were trying to bring in $30,000 US Dollars and we hadn't declared it or something like that and that we had a bunch of gifts we were bringing for them-perfumes, jewelery, clothing, toys...

What the lawyer needed my aunt to do was deposit 32,000 Pesos (which is like $3200 US Dollars) into a bank account. He gave her the bank account number and said that it would cover the fine and Ben would be released. My aunt spoke to the Man again and tells him that she's going to have to make some calls to see if a friend can lend her the money. The man tells her that hes thankful and that it won't be a big deal because he'll pay her right back when he gets there since he has money (but its been confiscated and paying the fine would release him and his money and his gifts).

My aunt calls her daughter Gaby and tells her the story asking if she can offer any money. Gaby says "anything for Benjamin, of course!" This happens with another cousin of mine and then my Aunt takes money that is set aside for a huge wedding/anniversary party they are having next month and tells her husband, "OK! lets go to the bank right now...hurry up, lets go!" My cousin Josue isn't liking the smell of the situation and tells his mom that she needs to call my parents to make sure this isn't all a scam. My aunt tells him that she cant because Ben told her it was a surprise and she couldn't tell anyone! Of course he persists and she calls my parents house.

Aunt: Hi Will (my dad) where is Benjamin?
Dad: At home, at work. Why?
Aunt: Are you sure?
Dad: Yes, why?

She tells him the story and he's like, "Woman, call the cops! Its a scam!"
She asks my dad to please call me and make sure that Ben isn't in Mexico (lol)

My dad calls me and asks where Ben is and I tell him he's at work. He then tells me the story(which was not the whole story, because my aunt hadn't been very detailed with him) and I get creeped out. I call Ben and he gets creeped out, too. My dad calls my aunt back to let her know we're fine and at home. While he's on the phone with her, my aunt's cell phone rings. Its the Man (he had asked for her cell number). My aunt puts the phones on Speakerphone so my dad can hear whats going on.

Man: Auntie, why did you trick me? You said you would pay the money.
Aunt: Oh son, its just that the woman who was going to lend me the money didn't have it and I don't have the money so I can't pay it. I'm sorry. Why don't you just leave half the stuff-we don't need the presents anyway we just want you safe. Is your wife there with you?
Man: Yes, but she fainted! The stress is too much for her and she fainted!

My aunt then tells him again to leave half the stuff and that she will see him soon, when he's released.
My dad is laughing saying "That sounds nothing like Ben!"
She says she swears it sounded like him and my mom of course understands...my dad talks to us regularly, my aunt however does not! So of course, the excitement and nervousness blurred her judgement.

My mom gets home from work that afternoon and hears all about it. She then calls my aunt and gets the full story. My aunt reported it to like a scam hotline of some sort, where you can remain anonymous. She gave them the account number and they said they had already received scam reports for that account number.

Its bizarre. I feel somewhat guilty that "we" caused such grief and stress to my family. I feel bad that they had to make so many changes to the house and that they stressed over some major cleaning. I also feel embarrassed that she had to call around and pool the money needed to bail us out-even though it wasn't us at all!

This was yesterday. And even today I am still very grateful to my Heavenly Father that they didn't fall for the scam and that they aren't out of so much money! He hears our prayers when we ask him to bless our family wherever they may be, even if our family is a bit naive and gullible. lol

Sleep Patterns?

2009-01-06T02:22:00.002-05:00

Why is it that when I go to bed late the kids stay asleep, nice and cozy no issues, no wake-ups in the middle of the night? And then, why is it that when I go to bed early they wake up and won't let me get back to sleep?

Is it a curse? Is it a blessing? Heaven only knows! :-)

I went to bed early tonight (or should I say last night?) since Ben has to get up at 3am (in a half hour from now) to get to work and Ezra would not stay asleep. At least Benny has not stirred.

Ezra is different from Benny. He loves to be cuddled all the time. If he isn't cuddled he won't sleep through the night. So unfortunately since I need sleep myself, he has been sleeping in bed with us. If not, he just cries and cries. Yeah, I know, it will be a hard habit to break. But I need sleep!! So for now it will do and I will deal with the consequences later, when I'm a bit more rested. hehehehe Wish me luck! I need it! Ezra will, however sleep great in his car seat when we're going out. We have tried putting him to sleep in his car seat at night and it worked for about a week and then he just bawled it out until we picked him up and laid him in bed with us. **sigh** Benny hated sleeping in bed with us. He still does!
At least when Ezra does get comfy and falls asleep he will sleep for at least 5 or 6 hours straight. That's been a blessing for me because I can get rest.

Ezra was sleeping in his cradle when he woke up. I'm thinking that might be why he woke up. Ezra does not like to be swaddled. He cries and grunts and complains. Benny on the other hand loved it! Swaddle him all day and even nice and tight and he was as happy as could be. I think that if Ezra would tolerate being swaddled he would sleep better on his own.

I just hope I can have the strength, in all aspects of the word, to get Ezra sleeping on his own soon. I'm tired of sleeping on just one side (since I'm holding/cradling him).

**yawn** He's asleep in his sling (which is around me at the moment) so I'm going to try and put him down and get some more sleep myself. :-)

Oh!!! And Benny started saying "night-night"!!!!!

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes...

2009-01-05T09:40:00.002-05:00

We kept it a secret and now its official!

We moved out of the 4th Branch and into the 3rd Ward. Yesterday was our first Sunday. It was weird, I have to admit. All day it felt like we were just visiting. I guess its because visiting the 3rd Ward was something we were already used to. I had to keep telling myself "this is your ward." Everyone was really nice and really welcoming, though. I appreciated it very much.

Yesterday was also Benny's first Sunday in Nursery. He loved it!! As we were in line to drop him off he was getting so impatient and was making noise because he wanted to go in already. No patience, my little turkey! Anyway, he did really well we were told and I'm sure that next week will go just as well. He did cry, though when it was time to leave. Can you tell he's not social enough?! lol I guess thats what you get when you're the eldest child and you're still only 19 months. :-P

Today will be a busy day I think. We're going grocery shopping and hopefully we'll get some other errands done. Ben is on vacation starting Wednesday! WooHoo! I think we're going to try to relax a bit and also get some painting done in the basement.

Happy Monday!

Happy New Year!

2009-01-01T20:35:00.002-05:00

I can't believe its 2009 already! I'm so excited for this new year. I'm excited for all the new things we will encounter and for the new people and places we will meet.

My hopes for this year are many. Although my resolutions for the new year have not been established yet. I've heard that when you write your resolutions down and look at them frequently you are more likely to stick with them. I hope to get these written down this week. I do know of one "goal" I have for this year: No Soda! I want to try and not drink any soda except for special occasions (i.e. at parties). Soda put on the pounds, and of course like the many other million Americans, I too, have the goal of losing weight this year.

Another goal of mine this year is to read The Standard Works. It seems like it will be hard and overwhelming, but at least I can try-and something is better than nothing.

Things at The Queendom are going well. I have my off days when both boys seem like they're going to make me go crazy, but for the most part I am really enjoying being a mom of 2. I am also getting more accustomed to all that this new duty entails. Ezra is now 1 month old, over 9lbs and breastfeeding is going well. I couldn't ask for more! Well, maybe a little more sleep-but I'll survive. :-)

Well, I should go now. I'm surprised I even got a chance to blog anything, so I'm not gonna push my luck! I'm gonna get going on some other Internet things that need to get done and then off to feed Ezra!

Time Flies

2008-12-19T22:36:00.002-05:00

I can't believe how quickly the end of the year has arrived! So many things have happened this year that we had been waiting for and anticipating and they have all come and gone. I am amazed at how quickly my pregnancy progressed and Ezra arrived. I marvel at how big Benny has gotten and how exciting is it to think about all of his accomplishments in his short life.

I had been thinking to Christmas for months and now its days away! I can't believe it, really. It just seems surreal how quickly it arrived. Patience is not one of my true virtues, so I'm grateful for feeling that things have come quickly.

This Christmas is going to be awesome! We have so many presents for Benny its crazy! I can't wait to see the look on his face when he plays with the things we got him. We got things on sale throughout the year for him and things that we had been wanting for him for a while. Oh, I just can't wait!

On top of all of these feelings of time flying and the excitement of Christmas finally arriving I also feel like I haven't gotten to enjoy the Christmas season much. I'm not complaining though! I'm just saying that I didn't enjoy it as much as I normally do-and that's that we put the Christmas tree up at the beginning of November! Usually by now I'm looking forward to putting away all the Christmas decorations because they've been out for a long time, but not this year. It seems like I want MORE Christmas, somehow.
Regardless, I will be glad when its over. It will be back to the grind, sort of. Planning the next big things in our family's life, ya know? It will be sad to put the Christmas tree away, though. Benny loves the lights and the decorations so much!
But that's the magic of Christmas, isn't it? Waiting for the special lights to come back next year-that will be great for Benny.

Well, happy weekend, my friends!

Determination

2008-12-18T08:58:00.003-05:00

I am determined to have a good day today. Yesterday was awful. Horrible, even. I might even add Miserable. I was cranky, moody, and overwhelmed to the max. I cried a bunch and thought the day would never end.

Luckily, today is a new day!

And I have gotten a nice night's sleep.

Today has already started off great and I intend to do my best to keep it that way! I have even already started a load of laundry and its only 9am!

I'm also looking online for some deals. Ben needs a new coat and I'm hoping to find a good sale or a good coupon to use! Wish me luck!

Ooh, and on another cool note...I added some more Gifts to Grow Points to my pampers account and now my total points is 117.5! That's enough for some nice rewards. I just have to choose what I want now, or decide if I'll wait to rack up some more.

There are a few things that our household does not compromise brand-wise. Diapers (I love me my Pampers! and Luvs and Huggies if I can get them dirt cheap) is one of them (Toilet paper is another. Scott brand all the way!). Its an extra perk that Pampers has this Gifts to Grow program-you can get some cool stuff for free.

Anyway, the load has stopped. Off to load the dryer and then to have some breakfast.

My first day alone was....

2008-12-17T00:42:00.002-05:00

HARD!

Both boys cried at the same time and seemed to egg each other on.
Both had poopies at the same time.
Both needed to eat at the same time.
Benny didn't want to nap when Ezra and I needed sleep really bad.
We had takeout for dinner because I had no time to make anything, let alone even go to the bathroom when I needed to.

I have a list of things I need to get done. I didn't get to a single thing today.
Tomorrow should go better, though. And I plan on getting more sleep tonight than I was able to get last night.

It will get easier.
It has to!
Right?!
It wasn't awful, or terrible, but it was worse than I expected. lol

I have to add, too, that I woke up thinking my parents were downstairs and I was sad when I realized they were in their own home.

Anyway, I'm off to bed now!

I'm back!

2008-12-15T14:42:00.003-05:00

My parents have gone back home this afternoon. Its now the four of us-our new little family. :)

Benny is fussy right now because he wants to get at a ball that's out of reach and Ezra is on me in his sling just happily sucking away at a binky that continuously falls out of his mouth. Smoochie (the dog) is running up and down the stairs being a little stinker-she's kinda going through hormonal issues right now, so she's crying all the time.

I have been thinking a lot about what I wanted to blog about and I have so many things I'd like to write, but I have chosen one thing to bring up for today.

Angels.
Yes, Angels.

I know that Angels are all around us. Spiritual ones that have no physical body and then those are are physically present with us. My parents have been the latter for us this week. The amount of help that they gave us these first two weeks since Ezra arrived have been wonderful. Yeah, I know I'm omitting the huge fight that my Dad and I had in the middle of the first week and the fact that some things got used that I didn't want used-but that's all nothing compared to the reality of the outcome of their presence.

My mother happily cooked all of our meals and took special care of Benny. She fed and bathed and changed him. My dad helped me reseal some huge boxes and moved heavy furniture for me while Ben was at work. My mom cleaned my basement-the unfinished part. It sparkles now-I kid you not. She helped me pack a bunch of boxes of stuff that was in the unfinished part of the basement. She threw out a bunch of trash and empty boxes that had been sitting on the basement floor for months.
She did all of our laundry. ALL of it-even comforters and sheets and pillowcases. Floors were swept and mopped. Dishes were washed, and even my fridge and oven were cleaned spotless. The microwave got a good scrubbing, the freezers got cleaned, too and even coolers that were outside on the deck got brought inside and scrubbed clean. My bathrooms are so clean I could eat off the floors. Even groceries were paid for. Babysitting was gladly provided for so we could go to doctors appointments, errand running and a work dinner.

The help that they gave us and the support they rendered was so incredible. Their generosity was so sweet and so loving that I just don't know what the right way would be to thank them for what they did. My load was so incredibly lifted! They left my house in much better shape than I could have possibly imagined. The work they did would have lasted me at least twice as long as it took them, especially with Benny to take care of and constant nursing of Ezra.

I'm sad my parents have gone home to Jersey. We're going to miss their presence. Their laughter, their kind words of support and unsolicited advice...lol. I think this is the most time I've been with my parents in one visit since I moved out of home. We had true angels staying with us these past couple of weeks. I'm so grateful. I love them. They are spectacular parents.

2008-12-05T19:01:00.001-05:00

heres my new little guy! i promise to blog a real post really soon! i've got lots to "talk" about!

Hooray!

2008-12-02T21:57:00.000-05:00

Baby Ezra was born on Saturday morning.

What a relief!

Hopefully soon I will post some pictures. With family being over and having to use the stairs to get to the computer, it might be a little bit.

He's beautiful, though!

Thanks for all the well wishes.

:-)

And the doctor says...

2008-11-25T01:28:00.001-05:00

I'm dilated to a 4!
WooHoo!
Any day now....
He said he doesn't think I'll make it to the end of the week.
WooHoo!
Need I say more?

**happy dance**

This is my "Complaints" post

2008-11-21T15:19:00.002-05:00

Complaints:

I have a nasty cold and I want it to go away!
I have a huge belly and I also want it to go away...hehehe
I have a little baby inside my belly that I want very badly to be born-like NOW!
Did I mention I have a cold? I can't breathe or sleep or swallow because my throat is so dry it hurts!
My ligament pain is totally crazy out of this world painful.
Did I also mention that I have regular Braxton Hicks contractions that make me want to cry?
I did a huge load of dishes (by hand, we don't have a dishwasher) and when I was done I felt like my hips were going to collapse into a million shards of bone.
I need chapstick 24/7 because of this cold.
I'm hungry right now.
My basement is cold (and I'm in it)
I'm doing laundry that needs to get done, but I really wish I was asleep
Benny just woke up from a nap that should have been longer than it was.

Thanks for reading my gripes. I'm sure its lovely to "hear" other people complain but I just couldn't think of anything better to blog about.

Monday Accomplishments!!!

2008-11-18T00:03:00.002-05:00

Great Monday, I have to admit!

Went to my weekly doctor's appointment. All is well. To quote my doc, we are in the waiting game now. He wants me in labor. Hooray!
Went grocery shopping. Saved 70% of my bill and got lots of great produce and even some items for free.
Had the love seat in the basement picked up this evening. It went to a home where it was greatly needed. It happens to be the same home where our denim love seat ended up.
Put Christmas tree up. Yeah, I know it's early, but I wanted to get it done before any potential baby births. Hehehe It looks beautiful!!!

I have to tell you about this awesome and a half tree topper we found! Its a crown! YES! A Crown!! (If you don't already know, I'm obsessed with crowns) Its gold and it has a red trim at the bottom. We got it for like $5 at Hobby Lobby (it was 50% off) last week. So we got red and gold spheres and icicles and glittery snowflakes. I got our tree skirt out and already put our presents under the tree. All were already wrapped and stored in our coat closet. I also hung our stockings up on the wall. All I need is my evergreen scented candles and my nativity and Santa. Everything else Christmas related has already been packed. Oh! I also put our jingle bell Christmas wreath up on the front door.

I took a very much needed nap
I had severe contractions for about 3 - 4 hours. I know it made some sort of physical progress. At least I HOPE it did! :-)

I didn't have very many accomplishments today, but they were enough to make me satisfied with what I did get done today. Tomorrow is a new day and let me tell you, with the energy I have I will probably scrub this house up and down! Right now I'm off to clean the kitchen. :-) Yeah, at 12:13am. But I just can't not do it! There's a force just leading me into the kitchen and I really want to clean! :-)

Winter Cleaning, but not the house

2008-11-12T12:37:00.002-05:00

When was the last time you went through all the files and documents you have on your computer?

I noticed last night that I had some files that I could delete, since I won't be using them anymore. So I added "Clean out computer files" to my to do list notebook before I went to bed. This afternoon after I put Benny down for a nap I got on the computer and started on my task. I deleted pictures and clip art and files and documents that have absolutely no purpose anymore. I'm sure that I freed up a lot of space. I mean I had scans of homework pages that were at least 3 years old that I had scanned to email. Do I really need that taking up space?

Anyway, it made me feel good. Cleaning usually feels good because I get rid of trash or junk that is taking up physical space. It felt the same way with the computer. I cleaned out and freed virtual space.

Seriously, the amount of stuff I deleted was enormous. Anyway, I suggest you look through your files and get rid of stuff you don't need. Why waste the space? A less loaded computer is a faster computer!

Baby Anticipation

2008-11-11T12:14:00.004-05:00

I have been trying to come up with some ways that I can convince my doctor into inducing me. LoL I have concluded that no matter what I come up with it won't work. Hehehehe, so I just have to wait like every other mother to be out there does. Oh well. You can't have your cake and eat it, too, right? But I can dream.... hehehe

I'm excited for Baby Ezra to be born. I can't wait! I'm so curious to see what he will look like and what his personality will be like. I'm also very excited and curious to see how Benny will react to a new baby brother.

We took a tour of the hospital this last week and it made everything seem really "real" to me, if that makes sense. I was flooded with a bunch of memories from my first labor and delivery experience. I was reminded of the pains and the needles and the shakes, but also of the excitement!! We also took a birthing refresher course that night after the tour. It was a good class. We mostly reviewed breathing and comfort techniques. It was nice to get back massages from Ben without asking him. Hehehehe, the instructor told him what to do and I just sat there almost drooling because it relieved so much tension. :-)

Baby arrival seems so close now! I can feel it, almost. The day will get here before I know it and that's both a great thing and a scary thing. What will it be like to have two children? How will I share my heart? I know I will...I just wonder how it will work and what it will feel like. I'll have two little boys to care for and worry about and to love and hold. **sigh** Motherhood is just a wonderful gift-I'm so blessed and grateful to be able to experience it.

Can you believe that my super organized self still has not finished packing a hospital bag? I'm ashamed. lol I'm almost done, though. All I need is a going home outfit for myself and a change of clothes for Ben. Other than that its ready. I should finish that today. That way I can stop complaining about it to myself. :-)

Its getting closer and closer! I can't wait!!

moving business

2008-11-05T15:36:00.003-05:00

My cold is just about gone, just so you know.

I counted all the boxes that I have packed. Almost 90 boxes. Isn't that amazing? We have stuff enough to pack into 90 boxes. And I still have a lot more to pack. I'm a good packer, though. I stuff boxes full to keep items safe and to keep the boxes sturdy. I can't imagine how many more we would have if I was careless about packing.

Our spare bedroom has become our box room. Boxes stacked from floor to ceiling and things are strewn about (things that I still need to go through and sort and stuff). I hope I can get most of this stuff done before the baby arrives. Its getting down to the wire!

My mom is coming in a few weeks for the arrival of her second grand baby. She'll stay with us for about 3 weeks and I am so thrilled! I'm going to need the help like nobody's business! My dad will fly in sometime shortly after my mom gets here. Double the help! Yahoo!

My basement is a mess, too! Things are piled, ready to be stored in their proper places and containers. Blankets are waiting to be washed and baskets are littered around waiting to be put into boxes big enough for them to fit in.

I need to make a path so that we can get rid of our couch that's downstairs and also the futon that already has a new home. I feel motivated, though, so hopefully things will go by more quickly than I'm expecting.

I need to clean the downstairs bathroom and the laundry room. My chest freezer also needs a cleaning, I think. Sitting here, though, typing this all out really makes me want to just get up and get moving on some of this stuff. Its waiting and I'm having energy right now, so I think that's what I'll go do now.

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, Its off to pack I go....

What a lame blog today. Sorry.

Letters

2008-11-03T10:16:00.003-05:00

When was the last time you wrote someone a letter? Not an email, but a true and tried hand written letter?

I love writing; I love expressing myself with words. If you haven't noticed, my blogs are usually pretty long. Sometime I have to remind myself that someone might not read it, because its too long. So I try and limit myself. But I love writing things out. It helps me vent and clear my mind and ultimately it always makes me feel good.

Today I will be writing a letter to someone. Today I will express myself with words on paper, with ink in my own handwriting. I will tell how I feel and what I think. I am excited and a bit anxious to get started. I haven't written out a letter in a long time. I have, however, written out a lot of cards-thank you, happy birthday, congrats, etc., but its not the same.

Letters are so personal. They show interest, I think. In our e-world that we live in letters are becoming more and more sparse.

I have a suggestion today: Think of someone you care about, someone special and write them a letter. Not a 4 sentence note, but a true letter. One that begins with "Dear..." or whatever word you choose and ends with a "Sincerely" or "Love" or Truly Yours" or whatever floats your boat. Tell the recipient of the letter something nice. Let them know that you care, or appreciate them. Let them know what you're thoughts are, or share a memory that you have together. It doesn't have to be a novel (like mine will probably be). Letters can really help someone feel special and important. It's especially nice when your spouse does it for you. :-)

You'll feel good. I promise!

Miserable breathing

2008-11-02T01:59:00.002-04:00

I am so sick!
I have caught an awful cold. I can't breathe, my throat dries up very quickly so I have to drink a lot of water, which makes me have to go to the bathroom a lot, even though I'm already going to the bathroom like every fifteen minutes because the baby has dropped. LoL I might move in to the bathroom tonight. Or maybe we should buy stock in toilet paper? Our choice is Scott brand. Its easy on the tush and easy on the nose, too! :-) I've already gone through one roll, and just on my nose!

Benny has a runny nose, too. He seems to be having trouble sleeping at night now, too, so he probably doesn't feel great.

Oh my gosh and my heartburn is seriously out of this world! Its comical to me, even though I feel like screaming. Last night I woke up heaven only knows how many times! I took 2 tums at least 4 times and woke up because I couldn't breathe, or because I couldn't swallow (dryness) or because I had to pee (at least 5 times during the night) and then poor Ben was snoring and that woke me up some and on top of that Baby Ezra was moving around like he was taking a karate class in there. **chuckles** and then Smoochie like somehow ended up laying on my face and Benny woke up crying like two times. Oh, it was a nightmare! No pun intended. Especially because I did actually have nightmares while I was actually asleep.

Tonight has been similar. I have already taken some Tylenol and I have a breathe right strip on my nose and I'm stocked up with tissue for my nose, water for my throat and some cough drops. I also took a Zantac pill (which my doc ok'd) for the heartburn. Benny woke up screaming and he wouldn't calm down so I snuggled with him until he was completely asleep and put him back in his crib. Its so hard to do things like that now, with my ginormous belly.

I finally laid down in bed and realized that we never changed any of our clocks for the end of daylight savings time. And Ben started snoring, so I decided to get up and change the clocks before actually attempting to sleep.

So now, off to change clocks and then hop in to bed (actually it will be more like ease my way into bed without cramping anything, although I probably won't be successful at the not cramping thing. hehehe)

Wish me luck!

What did you do?

2008-10-31T23:13:00.002-04:00

My Halloween was splendid. Benny dressed up as a pumpkin (super cuuuute!!!) and we took some pictures (he wasn't as cooperative with the picture taking as he normally is) and we were also able to attend the church's Trunk or Treat. Benny seemed to enjoy himself, but probably not as much as Mommy and Daddy did!

Its been a long day, though, for us in the Queen household. Among many things: sleep wasn't great last night (for any of us), Benny is fussing right now in his bedroom when he should be asleep and Daddy had a long day at work. Its just been a physically and mentally strenuous day (again, for all three of us). And to top it off I woke up with a cold! How icky, huh? Runny nose, watery eyes and a headache and since I'm preggo I can't do too much about it. Oh well, I'll survive, I'm sure. I just hope it doesn't last long! :-) At least baby Ezra is still in the womb having his own personal dance party with no cares in the world, except maybe the plenty of hiccups he's been having daily. Hehehehe Have I mentioned I hope he arrives soon? I had a doctor's appointment this week and I'm dilated to one centimeter. I know its not much, but at least I'm progressing towards the big day. I've had contractions so bad I thought it was seriously time. I welcome them, though, because they make me more and more ready for the big day-and I want that big day to get here fast! :-)

So anyway, the whole point of my post tonight was to ask "What did you do for Halloween Day/Night? I wanna know! (Especially from the lurkers that never leave me any comments! You know who you are, and so do I! lol)

I'm so tired! Goodnight!

Sleeplessness (is that even a word?)

2008-10-30T02:01:00.002-04:00

Its 2am. I should be asleep. I have been having a hard time getting to bed lately. I may be tired, but I just don't want to go to sleep and so I get a second wind and stay up way later than I should and then I get so tired that when I do lay down I'm out in just a couple of minutes. The last part I like, because sleeping has become like a chore for me because its so not comfortable right now. Falling asleep quickly allows me to bypass my physical discomforts and enter dreamy land immediately.

Anyway, tonight I had decided to get to bed earlier than usual, but then the phone rang and I was on the phone with my sister for over an hour. And now here I sit, at the computer, when I know I should be in bed. I even have an early doctor's appointment tomorrow. **sigh**

We voted today, or should I say yesterday? We voted early and it was very pleasant. Actually, it was exhilarating!! I almost got choked up when I cast my ballot. It was an amazing feeling to be able to voice my little opinion through my vote. I am so proud to be an American and to have the privilege of participating in the democratic process that allows us to be a free people in this country. I always feel good when I vote, but this time it was especially rewarding. I walked out very proud! I even put my "I voted" sticker on right away so everyone could see. I felt like a giddy little girl. And of course, I hope my Presidential Candidate of choice wins, too. It was really nice to get to vote for him and know that I was actually doing something to support him in his cause of being our Commander in Chief and not just talking about it or something like that. I also felt like I was "sticking it" to the other (candidate) guy as I voted for my presidential candidate of choice. That secretly felt reaaallly good. :-D

Alright, It's 2:15am now....I'm going up to bed.

Go McCain!

Yeah!

2008-10-28T16:28:00.002-04:00

I did it! I added a music player! It was the only thing missing to make my blog perfect for me! It took me a while, but I succeeded!

Family Updates

2008-10-28T14:16:00.003-04:00

Halloween is not cancelled! We've figured out a way to make it happen. Sure, its not the ideal way, but it will work and we have family to thank for that (thanks Anna and Jeff!!)!Trunk or treat starts at 7 (I thought it ended at 7!) and so Benny and I will catch a ride with the Drakes and Ben will meet us there when he gets off work at 7! I knew we'd be able to do something!
Also, we will be trying to vote early this week to avoid the craziness I'm sure we will encounter if we vote on election day. A local supermarket (PayLess) has early voting polls open every day from 10am-7pm all this week. It will be nice to get it overwith.
We finally mowed our lawn for the last time this season (maybe even ever). We got rid of all of our tall jungle like weeds and baby tree branches that were an annoyance.
We got rid of our loveseat. It went to a home where it was needed. Our branch president and the missionaries came over last night and helped with the yard work and the transporting of the couch.
The car seat fiasco has been fixed! All was cleaned and put back together and its as good as new!
Furniture has been moved in our bedroom to accommodate the baby bassinet. We moved a big dresser (it was falling apart) out to the curb and moved the changing table into our bedroom and out of Benny's room. That way when baby Ezra needs changing we don't have to bother Benny if he's asleep. We also moved a TV stand we had in our spare bedroom and put it in our bedroom. Its pretty cramped in there now, but it is making room for more boxes and things will be more efficient for baby things, too. Besides, it will only be like this for a short while.
I made delicious chocolate chip cookies last night and Benny had like 5! Chocolate covered little man-he's just got to be the cutest little boy ever. :-) (I can say that-I'm his mother!)
Ben has a presentation today for his French class and I think it's going to be a great success. He worked really hard on it and he is really pleased with it.
My sister's nephew (her husband's sister's oldest son) committed suicide this week. He was 19. Our thoughts are with them as they mourn the loss of such a young man.
I have 5 weeks left with this pregnancy. I hope it will end in about 4 weeks, though. Hehehe, but doesn't every pregnant woman desire it to end a little bit early? My doctor told me he would probably not let me go over more than a week. I told him that he better not or else I would have to threaten him. :-)
Benny has started counting, saying "1,2,3" and has learned to say baby when he sees a baby! Although, it sounds more like Daddy than baby, but its for sure baby. His actual Daddy word sounds clearly "daddy" Benny has also started saying Thank you a lot more clearly. He seems very proud of himself for saying it more clearly so he says it more often. He's also been waking up in the mornings and just starts laughing at heaven only knows what all by himself. Its really cute!

Alright my dear blog readers, I am off to do some housework now. This nesting instinct is getting stronger by the day! (so is the pelvic pain and the heartburn!!!!)

Halloween Annoyance

2008-10-25T13:56:00.002-04:00

Ben got his work schedule for the month of October at the end of September, beginning of October. The original schedule said he was off on Halloween. We were excited about that since it would be the first year that Benny could really go trick or treating. Before Ben got his schedule we had just assumed we wouldn't be able to do much of anything on Halloween. He's been having to deal with schedule issues that are becoming more and more annoying, but ultimately, they are liveable. At least he isn't getting any problems with having Sundays off and with working around his school schedule, so I guess I shouldn't complain (even though I want to).

Anyway, this week he was looking at his schedule for next week and noticed that he was scheduled to work on Halloween. He's scheduled until 7pm. By the time he gets home from work it will be almost 8pm. He never gets off on time and its at least a 20-25 minute drive home. He sent his manager a message asking if he could be let off an hour or two early. Ben just called me to tell me that his request was denied. He's really upset.

We had planned going to the church's Trunk or Treat thing for the kids and were excited because Benny's cousins, and grandparents would be there, too. Now we won't be able to make it at all. We won't even really be able to take Benny trick or treating in the neighborhood. Getting started at 8pm doesn't appeal to me and Benny might be cranky by then, too.

Halloween this year is more for Ben and me than it is for Benny. He's still too little to really know whats going on and if he misses out on the fun, he won't have a clue. But we were looking forward to his first real year of participating in Halloween activities. I don't really want to do anything with Benny without his Daddy, so I think Benny and I will just stay home.

To make the wound deeper, Ben worked until 10pm last night, too (as he is normally doing on Fridays and Saturdays now-so we have NO life and it makes it worse because soon we will have a newborn and that makes it even less of a possibility that we'll have time to ourselves). Last night was our branch Halloween party. Its always really fun and EVERYONE (even the adults) dress up. We have yummy food, trick or treating at all of the rooms in the church and we always have a pinata. Anyway, Ben was scheduled to work until 10 so we knew we wouldn't be able to go to the party. Ben didn't ask for any shift changes so we could go because he knew that he would have Halloween off.

Well now we've missed out on all Halloween festivities for the year and theres nothing we can do about it. And frankly, it brings me to tears.

I am a GENIUS!!!!!! (or at least resourceful)

2008-10-22T15:54:00.002-04:00

We had decided not to throw the car seat out.

I kept feeling that there had to be a way to salvage it and truly disinfect it without damaging it, or without having to purchase a new car seat. We even went "shopping" for one last night and found some at decent prices. But what's the best price for us? No price at all! Trying to salvage it would be much more economical.

Anyway, I keep a very well stocked folder full of every owner's manual for every single item we have. I found the car seat's instruction manual and read that the canopy (which has mold on it) can be washed in the washing machine-therefore, it CAN be removed. I just had to figure it out.

I came downstairs and took the seat cover off (which I had previously known that I could) and then after closer examination of the car seat figured out a way to fully remove the straps!!! There is a black plastic part that attached the straps to the actual car seat that I couldn't remove successfully, so I will just pull those to the very end of the straps and make sure I don't submerge them into the bleach solution I will submerge the rest of the straps (plus, there wasn't any mold near those plastic pieces).

So, two down (the seat cover and the straps) one more to go (the annoying canopy)!

I looked on google for help on taking the canopy off. I found a cool site called www.fixya.com and found some tips on how to do it. One of the explanations didn't make much sense to me, because I couldn't figure out what parts the person was talking about, but I saved it just in case. I then called evenflo directly (because I couldn't find ANYTHING on their website to help me) and the customer service rep was very nice and explained how I could do it. I hung up and tried and of course I wasn't able to come even close to getting it off.

I examined the canopy attachments even more closely and put two and two together. With the not so very helpful help the evenflo lady gave me and with the info from www.fixya.com I figured out my own way to get it off. And I did!!!

So now, I'm off to make a bleach solution to soak the straps in for a few hours and then I will put the seat cover and canopy in the washing machine with hot water and bleach and I will have a clean and mold-free car seat! I am completely confident that I will be able to get it safe for baby Ezra.

My bean bag is lost forever, though. No biggie. We paid about $10 for it and have had it for about 5 years, if not more. We can always get another one. And its one less bulky thing we have to move across the country, right? :-)

The play mat is also a goner. But we found some for under $20 at Walmart and I can probably find some on ebay or craigslist, too. Maybe one of Ezra's grandmas will get one for him this Christmas! (hint, hint...lol)

The playpen is also gone, BUT!!!! We have a spare playpen in NJ-its a few months newer than the one we just threw out, so no biggie there.

I'm grateful for my brain power! That and some definite divine intervention/inspiration!

When it rains, it pours

2008-10-21T11:23:00.002-04:00

Why does it seem that when one little thing goes wrong it becomes the start of a domino effect and then every other little thing come crashing down, too?

Its not the end of the world, but I'm still annoyed and a bit upset. The finished part of the basement has always been sound and we've never had any issues. Our computer is down here and we feel completely comfortable that its safe (from humidity and such).

Yesterday as I was doing some major packing and major loads of laundry (we hardly had any clean clothes left) I decided that I would close the playpen and have Ben take it upstairs into our storage room. The playpen has been down here since the summer, when my niece Heidi used it. As I went to move the playpen I noticed that there was something sort of fuzzy on the bottom. Lo and behold! It was mold!

It was disgusting. It seems that something must have spilled in there (like maybe from a sippy? Benny has used it a couple of times while I've been on the computer). Anyway, mold everywhere on that playpen. I examined everything else-the floor, some blankets on the floor, but everything else was fine. I continued with my tasks for the day and started emptying out my downstairs pantry-moving all my food upstairs, since its no longer going to be full (we're trying to use up all our food). I noticed that a fabric bean bag that was right by the playpen, that I hadn't previously examined also had a tad bit of mold on it. Ugh! So frustrating!

I then started getting paranoid and decided to look EVERYWHERE and once again didn't find anything. Except I hadn't looked at the infant car seat (that Ezra will be using). Inside the car seat was a play mat/play gym thingy that you put on the floor for the baby. I checked the car seat and the actual seat was fine, nothing on it. I checked the visor thingy that keeps the sun off the baby and sure enough the nylon lining did have a bit of mold, just a bit. I then looked at the inside of the play mat and yes, there was mold inside it. I examined the car seat once again and sure enough I looked at the straps that I hadn't looked at before and they were covered in mold. What the heck?!

Nothing else had mold on it, nothing. I even had all of our luggage and suitcases and gym bags under the car seat and nothing had a even a tiny bit of mold on it. We figure it started in the play pen and spread from there. I think I may have put some of the damaged items inside the playpen at one point to get at something else that was behind those items.

So, we threw the playpen out. We threw the bean bag out and the play mat, too. The car seat still has to go. I looked up info on how to clean this stuff off and theres no way I can get any of these specific items clean enough to be safe for the baby (or Benny).

So now, money for a new playpen, money for a new play mat and money for a new stinkin' car seat. It's truly pouring now! If we had known we would have had to buy this stuff for the new baby we would have budgeted it in-no problem. **sigh** Now its just an extra expense we don't need right nor were expecting.

And me being anal, what bothers me the most about the whole situation is that I already have a date set for the installation of the car seat into our car. Its coming up and I hope we can have it by then so I don't start getting all anxious about the situation, because once again, if you haven't noticed, I'm kind of a control freak. :-)

Should I be ashamed?

2008-10-17T14:34:00.002-04:00

Despite the current economy and the increase of coupon usage, there are many people who look down upon those that try to save money by using coupons. There are people who may possibly huff and puff behind you in the checkout lane because they have to wait for you to scan your coupons before you can pay. What do I think of this unreasonable phenomenon?

Deal with it, buddy!

I did some shopping at Meijer last night. I got some superb deals! Some of them:

Kellogg's brand cereal (different flavors) for $1 each, with coupons.
Dawn dish liquid and Cascade dishwasher gel for $1.40 each, with coupons.
Minute Maid Fruit Punch and Cherry Lime-aid, half gallon cartons for 47cents each, on clearance.

My total out of pocket expense was $48.03. I had a total of 22 coupons. 4 of them were doubled to $1.00. My total coupon savings was $22.50. My total non-coupon savings was $39.24.

My total savings on the shopping trip was $61.74. I saved over 50% of my grocery bill. I was so happy! I did a little dance before leaving the store, and yes, people did stare at me. But it was worth it! Also, the Catalina (the little machine that prints out coupons for you as your receipt prints out) printed out 3 VERY nice coupons that I will surely use.

So should I be ashamed that I walked out of the store thrilled and giddy and pretty verbal about my joy? Should I be ashamed that I search for my deals and prepare with lists and comparisons before I hit the stores? Should I be ashamed that I sit and clip coupons? Should I be ashamed that I carry a bulky file organizer with me EVERY TIME I go ANYWHERE, just in case I run into a good deal and I have a coupon to make it even better? Should I be ashamed that I am prepared to shop around and not make the first purchase I see? Should I be ashamed that I share my coupons with others that might benefit from them? Should I be ashamed that I stop people in the store because I notice they had something in their cart that I have a coupon for that I'm not going to use? "Hey, excuse me, but I noticed you were purchasing X product. I have a great coupon here for that same product if you would like to use it." Only once has someone declined-and only because they already had the same coupon in their possession! :-)

I saw a lady at the store last night with an awesome coupon binder! It was an actual binder, with 3 rings and it had card protector sheets (you know, like for baseball cards) and she had coupons inserted in each of the pockets. I complemented her on such an awesome binder and showed her my file folder. She said that her husband gave her a hard time before leaving home, saying "you go alone, its embarrassing to be shopping with so many coupons." She proceeded to tell me that she thinks its funny that he says junk like that but when she gets home "he doesn't complain when he sees the receipt!" He knows that she saves them tons of money, but he's just too proud to admit that it takes work.

I love couponing. I love what I do for my family's budget. I would hope that people would be happy that I can come home saving over 50% of my bill, because of what I do. I will stand tall and show my receipts off to the world! I will not be ashamed that we can have extra money because of my snips and clips and deal huntings! :-D

Back at home!

2008-10-16T01:02:00.002-04:00

We had a fantastic time in New Jersey! We got back at 5am on Tuesday. It was along drive back, we ended up leaving hours after we had planned to and we made several long stops. It was so nice to get home and sleep in our own bed (and crib)! We missed Smoochie a lot and it was nice to snuggle with her, too.

So on Friday morning we went to the Manhattan temple and had an incredible session. It was wonderful to finally be back in the temple. The last time we had gone I was in my second trimester of pregnancy with Benny! I was very pleasantly surprised to see that my receiver at the end of the session was a man that has known my family since before I was born. The feelings were overwhelming. I held his hand longer than you normally would in that situation and told him how glad I was to see him and he remembered who I was!! It was really neat, considering he is an old man. One of his sons could be my father. :-) Both Ben and I felt much comfort about the worries we've had in our minds-especially the whole moving thing.

Oh! And we got to see Parson's School of Design!! We got out of the subway right in front of it!! It was so cool! (Its the place where Project Runway is filmed)

Friday evening we (including my parents) went to Aime and Paul's house to stay there for the rest of our visit. We had a great time watching movie after movie after movie. On Saturday we went to wonderful IKEA!! I was able to purchase some things that I've been wanting for Ezra's room and some other little goodies that I probably could have lived without. :-) We then went to Toys R Us where Ben and I found some AWESOME clearance deals on clothes for the boys (boys...that sounds so surreal!!). They had things on clearance plus a 20% more off of that. We got these cute shirts...Big Brother and Little Brother. Oh, I can't wait!

When we got back to Aime's house there was company waiting. Paul's cousin Sondra and her hubby Cesar and their two kids came up from Maryland (Rockland) to spend the night (funny coincidence, huh? Since Eddie and Kelly and their kids were supposed to come up from Maryland, too). We had a great dinner (take out roasted chicken, salad, veggies and Spanish rice from a Portuguese restaurant nearby) and then we had great dessert consisting of ice cream. The kids went to bed and the adults started to have a party! Aime invited two of her closest friends-Nadia (and her hubby) and Diana. We played Apples to Apples for like 3 hours and had such a blast!!!! Ben won and he was pretty proud of himself. Hehehehe It was just really nice to have such a good time.

Sunday morning was another story. Ben and I didn't end up getting to bed until 2am, so we decided that we would skip church. The only real reason why we wanted to go to church was to check out the ward that we will be in. But since we were only going to stay for sacrament meeting, we decided it wasn't worth getting up super early to shower and iron clothes and get out there just for sacrament and then come back to half of our last day. So we slept in a little and when we got up Aime came to tell us to get dressed because we were going to the park.

We went to this really cool Family Amusement Park. It was full of rides and yummy amusement park food. I had funnel cake for the first time! I was even able to have cotton candy (you may not know this, but I had a very bad craving for cotton candy back in July-when the county fair came I think I ate more cotton candy than any human being should). Benny rode on the carousel for the first time and even I got on one of the horses, too. We took a train ride around the park, too. All the other adults and children except for me and my dad went on a bunch of other rides. Ben got on this really cool roller coaster and it was fun to watch. Although, I must say I lamented being pregnant some, because it would have been fun to get on the rides AND it would have been nice to really get my money's worth, ya know? After a light snack at the park Sondra and her family left to drive back to Maryland and the rest of us went to the mall. We had a really yummy dinner at a buffet place and then went home to watch more movies.

We got to bed late again, but it was worth it. I spent some really great time talking with my sister and in the morning we were laid back and took our time to get ready to leave. It was a wonderful trip! And it was very nice that it wasn't so hard to say goodbye to my family, because they'll be out in less than two months for Ezra's birth, so we'll get to see them soon.

Now its back on track time! Packing, cleaning and more prep for baby and moving! :-)

(I'll get some pictures of our trip up soon)

Vacationing on the east coast

2008-10-09T23:33:00.003-04:00

We went to Manhattan tonight. We had such a great time! We walked a lot, however, and now my feet are killing me!!! We had Mr. Softee Ice Cream, which I grew up with and it was yummalicious! We also had some guy do some magic tricks for us on the street and we bought some cool watches off a stand in Times Square, too. They're nice! I always wanted to buy something off one of those street vendors. Hehehehe We also went into the mega huge Toys R Us in Times Square. We had a really good time looking at things. We tried to make it to the NBC store, but they had already closed by the time we got there. As we walked along I started getting really painful contractions. I was freaking out a bit. They were strong enough to make me have to stop walking. Baby Ezra was also moving in such a way that made me be in even more pain. I felt ginormous and I couldn't believe that I had walked so much AND that I would have to walk even more just to get home. All is better now, though.

Today we also had some delicious Termini's Pizza. Oh my gosh, this stuff is THE BEST! Ben and I look forward to having some every time we come visit. It was sooo gooooood! We have some leftovers, and I think I'll have a slice before hitting the bed. We walked some on Bergenline Avenue today, the shopping district, if you will, in my hometown. I saw some familiar faces, but I hate to admit, I didn't make eye contact because I didn't really want to talk to anyone.

We also went to Boulevard east this evening and took lots of pictures of the skyline and we took a few family shots and lots of pictures of Benny, although, Benny was really cranky because he hadn't taken a second nap (like he normally does). He was fussy and whiny and wouldn't smile. He's also been REALLY clingy with Ben-since we left home, so I know its not an unfamiliarity thing. I'll share photos when I get back.

Abuelita and Abuelito have been having a blast with Benny! Playing and laughing and holding him. He's been loving on them like crazy, too. Giving kisses and hugs. Its amazing how he hadn't forgotten them. He knew right away who his Abuelita was and quickly gave her lovins.

Tomorrow will be a good day! We are going to the 11am session at the Manhattan Temple and then later in the day we will go to my sister Aime's house and we'll get to visit with her and her hubby Paul. We'll spend the rest of our vacation at her house, along with my parents.

Our drive out was the most pleasant ever! It was laid back and relaxed and it was awesome to have cruise control! We ran into rain the first 5 hours or so and that was annoying, but it wasn't bad at all. Gas outside of Lafayette is way cheaper. Gas here right now is between $2.80 something to $3.20. Nice prices compared to the $3.58 a gallon we paid before heading out of Lafayette. We stopped to rest a few times and got some good sleep. Ben and I also had some really great conversations-very meaningful ones and it was really nice. I hope our drive back is as good!

I'll tell you all about the rest of our trip soon!

My Autumn

2008-10-03T09:57:00.007-04:00

Its chilly!! Nights are now for snuggling around a big comfy blanky, no more turning the fan on at night. Benny wakes up with cold hands and legs-why won't he just keep that cozy fleece blanky around him? Little turkey!
The leaves are turning and already everywhere on the ground.
Hot cocoa and some toast sounds perfect for breakfast, or even some hot oatmeal!! (although oatmeal gives me KILLER heartburn-pregnant or not!)
We went out to run some errands yesterday and we all ended up wearing a sweater or jacket.
Autumn has arrived for me and I couldn't be happier! My autumn this year means more than it did last year.

Autumn means I can pack my sandals and summer stuff for the family, until next Summer in a new home.
Autumn means more warm food and drinks...yum
Autumn means chilly mornings and chilly nights
Autumn means long sleeves
Autumn means I'm getting REALLY close to having this baby
Autumn means the bugs are dying and aren't going to bother me for much longer!!!
Autumn means wearing socks. I LOVE socks. Especially those I call "fun socks." Those are socks that have prints on them, or cute things. I bought a really cute pair last night with crowns on them. They are for the hospital when I deliver. I'm gonna try to bring this baby into the world with style! hehehehe
Autumn means a trip to visit family in NJ
Autumn means Benny's first year of Trick or Treating
Autumn means colorful evenings looking at the sky and at the falling leaves
Autumn means soon we can put the lawn mower away! WooHoo!
Autumn means we can weed-wack the garden and get rid of everything

I can go on and on, but I'm getting hungry, so I'm going to go eat something. :-)

What does this Autumn mean for you?

From mail to mail or not to mail?

2008-10-02T15:11:00.003-04:00

As much as I enjoy getting emails (of any kind) there is something just extra special about getting something in the mail. It makes me feel important, it makes me feel special somehow. Someone thought of me and sent me something. They care. Obviously this is not including junk mail, but even then if I get more than one piece of mail (even junk mail) I feel successful somehow.

Silly, isn't it?

My mom sends me short little notes every once in a while and those are really special. I get cards and postcards from friends every now and then. Those are really neat, too. Then there are my coupons and samples that I get in the mail. Those make me feel like I've hit the jackpot.

Lately, though I have been wondering about mail in general. Email and the Internet are getting so big and powerful now that I fear that sending and receiving a Christmas card in your mailbox at home will be a thing of the past. Also, what about the USPS? They are having to raise their prices more regularly to compensate the loss of business that they've been having due to Email. Don't get me wrong, though, I'm not freaking out or thinking this will inevitably happen (the USPS has less and less business) nor do I think we will be in a Christmas card crisis next Christmas. I am simply thinking about the possibilities.

Its sad, though. Although I love getting snail mail, I also am very tempted to use email more often instead of snail mail. For example, I will email a picture to my parents, instead of printing one out and mailing it. Which is fine, I know, but I also know it would be more convenient for them to have a hard copy (especially so my mom can show it off immediately!).

Now going back to Christmas cards. This Christmas I really want to send cards out with a family picture, or perhaps just one with Benny and soon to be born Ezra. We'll be moving and its also Christmas time so money will be tighter than usual. What should I do? Skip the cards altogether? Send out a card with a small snapshot inside? Make my own Christmas cards/announcements? Email a type of e-card with a Holiday message and the family picture? Do I just email a picture of the new baby?

I know what I want to do, but I wonder if it really is worth my money. I wonder is it even kosher to send out a card/announcement via email? Will I be considered tacky? Will I be disappointing someone who would have preferred a picture to stick on their fridge, or photo album? I know, I know...I'm making this a huge deal when it really is a simple decision to make.
I know its not a big deal. I just need to think a little more and finally make a decision. Do you have any suggestions or opinions?

What to blog about today?

2008-10-01T13:19:00.003-04:00

I have plenty of things to gripe about, but I don't want to lie beneath a negativity blanky, so I'll bypass that route.

We have discovered Benny's favorite TV show. Yo Gabba Gabba!

Benny smiles really big when the show starts and looks at us, like "Are you serious? It's really on?! This is awesome!"

He dances along with the music, loves the characters and laughs hysterically at certain parts. We have not gotten reactions like this from him from any other TV show. We have like 17 episodes DVRed so far and it works like MAGIC to calm him down from a cry-fest. Seriously, its like a magic pill or something. We put it on and all drama disappears instantly.

Ben and I really enjoy the show, too. We watch the new episodes together-the three of us. They have real bands play on the Music Friends Show portion of the show and they also have famous people come in for Dancy Dance time where they (the famous person) teaches a new dance. This season Melora Hardin (Jan on the Office) showed up for a birthday party and the creator of the show let it slip in an interview that Jack Black was going to be on this new season, which just started at the end of September.

The other day at Walmart we went by the toy section because we were looking to see what sorts of things we might consider for Benny for Christmas and we found Yo Gabba Gabba toys! Oh my gosh, I wanted them all. How silly, huh? I got just as excited as Benny did (and so did Ben).

The music of the show really sticks to your head, but not in an obnoxious way, they're really cool songs with really cool beats.

Variety magazine has a neat article on the show you can check out:

http://www.variety.com/article/VR1117991028.html?categoryid=2522&cs=1

We love Yo Gabba Gabba!

Marvelous Monday Mail

2008-09-29T13:49:00.005-04:00

I'm not usually excited about Mondays, but today I am. I got up groggy as usual for a Monday and did my regular morning routine. I went out to get the mail and when I opened the mailbox was shocked to find it jammed full of mail. I had at least 10 envelopes to open, let alone 3 magazines plus some junk mail and advertisement postcards. I will give you a highlight of the wonderful mail I got today!

I got the latest issue of one of my favorite magazines- Ready Made http://www.readymade.com/
I also got Better Homes and Gardens, which came with a great insert full of coupons.
I got coupons for free entrees from Michelina's because I emailed them to let them know how much I enjoyed their frozen entrees.
I also got an AWESOME PG Brand Saver (Proctor & Gamble) coupon insert in the mail (because I filled out a survey) with coupons worth over $74-this is the same insert that was in yesterday's paper. Oh my gosh, I was in heaven yesterday clipping coupons and today when I got a duplicate of what I got yesterday in the paper I almost had a heart palpitation. They are awesome coupons!
I got 3 coupons for $1 off ANY Huggies product because I emailed them to let them know that I enjoyed their diapers and baby toiletry items. This sweet coupon deal means I can probably get some wipes for less than $1!
I got my Home Made Simple Coupon Booklet!!! Awesome coupons (like Mr. Clean, Swiffer, Cascade) that can be doubled, plus a coupon for a free item!
I also got a school fundraiser thing from two of my nephews. Really great magazine subscription rates. I may have to get something!
I got an insurance claim "receipt" saying that some lab work for Benny wasn't covered and I may owe my provider $1.00. Yes, just a buck. :-)
Ben's pay stub :-D
Vehicle insurance statement/bill and its $20 less than last month's bill!
Verizon bill arrived and we have a credit of over $200, so we don't have to pay anything this month. How did that happen? We must have paid twice one month. It's pretty awesome, though.

And then I check my email and I have a friend request on facebook from someone I knew when I was like 12 or 13! She served a mission in my home ward and I would go on splits with her and she was just the sweetest sister missionary and I had been wondering what had happened to her.

Oh, just lots of fun and happy surprises today for me! I hope this is a forecast for the rest of the week! All I need now to make this day almost to perfection is some chocolate! Hehehehe

Money, money, moneeeeeey

2008-09-25T13:24:00.002-04:00

The economic situation that we're in here in the United States of America is driving me up the wall! I am in a sort of freaking out mode. Thinking twice about every single solitary penny we spend and worrying about the problems that may arise with our move. Will we be able to sell the house? Will we be able to find a "steal" of a house? As you may or may not know, houses in Jersey are tons more expensive than they are here. Of course, the area that you move to affects this price, but since we want to live in a nicer neighborhood we're finding higher prices. We already have a realtor looking for us and we'll see where that takes us. **sigh**

Watching the news is like a really guilty pleasure. I want to watch, but I know I'm going to end up worried and depressed afterwards. Hehehehe, but I just can't help it. I watch Glenn Beck nightly and he has such a good way of freaking you out with whats going on today that I have tried to stop watching, but he just mesmerizes me and I have to go back for more. I'll admit, I think he's really cute, too! :-D I really like his way of telling things and I think he's really intelligent. I also seem to agree a lot with his personal views. I sometimes imagine him inside the Temple or at church taking the sacrament. He cracks me up! I bet he'd be a fun Home Teacher or Home Teaching companion! Anyway, I've digressed.

I sincerely pray every night that no one in our family suffers any of the bad consequences of the economic issues our country is faced with now. I hope that we can all find ways to live happily and comfortably without freaking out about the bills, or the mortgage or "how're we gonna pay for THIS now?" sorts of things. I hope we're all ok.

I hope that things get better soon and that people start realizing that money isn't everything. I hope that this can cause a change of heart in many around the country.

I hope our new president makes changes that really make a difference. But lets not get into the Presidential candidates topic. That's a whole other post. You may not want to know what I think. I am a little ignorant about politics, but I do have my opinion and its a strong one!

Anyway, that's my blog for today...

Randomness Post

2008-09-24T17:31:00.002-04:00

My basement, all of a sudden smells like apple juice. Weird. Maybe I'm getting an ultra strong sniff of my shampoo? My hair is clean, after all. Weird...
The cricket isn't as loud anymore. Maybe he moved to another spot? Or maybe!!! He died!
Benny is now waking up from a nap.
Smoochie got a haircut and a bath. She looks teeny now, and thankfully not matted anymore!
I started using the new family search.org site and I think I'm becoming obsessed. I all the way to the 1830s and have found a lot of duplicate information. This won't be easy! But I am REALLY determined to get everything right and then branch out to farther and wider family lines.
I'm starving!
Ben has a big presentation due tomorrow. Wish him luck!
I need to do laundry really bad. Wish me luck, now.
New season of shows start this week!
I still smell sweet apple juice.
I sent Aleks Syntek another comment and he responded back, AGAIN! Sweet!
I have started a new book and I am determined to finish it before the end of the month!
I'm still starving and Benny is still waking up, so I should go and nourish myself and rescue Benny out of his crib.

Toodles!

The Cricket and the Package

2008-09-23T13:54:00.005-04:00

We have a cricket in our basement-in the laundry room (hence yesterdays nasty post about crickets). It hasn't stopped chirping since yesterday. Well, I'm sure it has at some points, but for the most part it has gone on and on and on.

At one point it was very close to the door from the laundry/storage area to the finished part of the basement and I was freaking out that if I opened the door it would jump on me. So I waited for Ben to get home and he went in to see if he could find it. It was still loud, but no where to be seen, so who knows, maybe it got itself into the wall. The point is I want it dead and if Ben couldn't find it, I sure as heck am not going to look for it myself. So all I can do now is cross my fingers that it dies quickly and SOON!

The noise is just horrible to me. Anyway, moving along....

I got an awesome package in the mail yesterday!! I ordered this free "kit" for moms from Quaker a couple of weeks ago and had completely forgotten about it. It arrived yesterday late afternoon and I brought it and opened it. To my understanding it was supposed to be a sample and a coupon for a granola bar or something.

To my surprise it was much more than that!!

2 sample sized boxes of Cinnamon Life Cereal
2 whole granola bars, the new Nature something or other that Quaker has just put out
2 sample sized packages of Chocolate Granola Mix
1 WHOLE SIZED box of 8 granola bars-the kind of box you'd buy at the store
1 cool blue bracelet for Benny (like the Livestrong plastic band bracelets)
1 coupon for $2 off a Quaker product.

This was big! I was already a fan of Quaker brand, but if they went through all this trouble to send me these awesome freebies, they've definitely got my business! It made my day and drowned out the nasty cricket for a while!

Nasty creepy things

2008-09-22T18:24:00.002-04:00

I hate crickets! I HATE THEM!

They are disgusting. The noise they make is irritating enough to make me want to find them and squish them.
And if that weren't enough aggravation, I'm also very afraid of them.
I know, its embarrassing to me, too.
If you know me at all, you know that all bugs freak me out-even moths, maybe especially moths. I'm a wuss, I admit it. But then again, I am a city girl and did not grow up with bugs around. My encounter with these nasty creatures was always only at Girls Camp for a week in the Summer.

I despise crickets. Eeew, I even have goosebumps just thinking about them. They make me angry.

I thought about adding a picture of one to this post, but I changed my mind. They don't deserve to be publicized.

east coast trip!

2008-09-22T13:07:00.003-04:00

We are visiting my family on the east coast in October. We are meeting up for one or two nights with Ben's brother and his family-they also live on the east coast, about 3 1/2 hours away from my family. The original plan was to have them stay at my sister's house and we would stay at my mom's house, which is about 20 minutes away from her. Its funny to me, in a cute way, how excited my sister is about this visit. She has "hired" help to come clean her house for her (a.k.a. My Mom) so her house can be nice and neat and clean for her company. She is all excited about having them stay at her house, but what causes me more funnies in a cute way is that she has already made the decision that we will also be staying at her house AND so will my parents. :-) We'll have a big family party at her house.
When my mom told me all this, I could tell she was kind of bummed because I know she wanted us to stay at her house, but I reminded her that it would only be for probably the max, 2 nights and that seemed to make it ok. But its just funny to me that my sister wants everyone to stay at her house. I think she really enjoys having family stay over and I know she considers Ben's family her family.
My mom is excited that she gets to babysit all the kids so that the grown ups can go into the city and get to see places and do things. I think that may be a factor in my sister wanting my parents to stay the night, too. Plus, my mom will be off work the whole time we'll be there, so no worried about work issues. My dad is great with kids, too, and I know he'll have a good time.
Knowing my sister is so excited about this visit makes me have fuzzies inside. I guess I just assumed it wouldn't be a big deal to her. But its nice that it is.
This is going to be an exciting trip-I'll be 7 months pregnant and my family hasn't seen me really pregnant, ever, except for the one day before I went into labor with Benny. We will also probably look at some houses, I'll get to eat foods that I'm craving REALLY bad, I'll get to visit the city and show Ed & Kelly all these great places! I'll also get to see my family and have them seen Benny-they haven't seen him since May! We'll also hopefully will get to go to the Manhattan temple. Its been a while since we've been able to go to the temple, at least out there it will be a lot shorter of a trip than from here to Chicago.
I am stoked!