Thursday, September 11, 2008

September 11th

Well today is a special day in my heart. 7 years after 9/11. I remember it like it was yesterday. I actually dreamt it happened the night before it did.

I was preparing to move out here to Indiana and I had been going over to Boulevard East, this strip of street that's right on a cliff that overlooks the Hudson River and has full view of the New York skyline. Anyway, I had been going to Blvd. east to think and be alone. Preparing to leave, knowing that it would never be the same to be back there. So I had planned on taking pictures of the skyline and the night before 9/11 was when I had planned on doing it. I got to Blvd. east, which was only 2 blocks up from my house and realized I forgot my camera at home. Feeling lazy I said to myself "Eh, I'll do it tomorrow, the skyline isn't going anywhere."

I had feelings of regret the next morning when the skyline was drastically different.

It was scary. The amount of helicopters and low flying jets over my roof was overwhelming. It felt like we were at war. I saw people walking waiting for the bus, people that had just gotten off the ferry down below Blvd. East. Some were covered in soot. Some looked frazzled and scared. I wanted to comfort everyone somehow, but yet I was in need of comforting, too.

I remember very vividly the smell. I'd never smelled burning flesh, but once I smelled it, I knew that's what it was. The winds were blowing fiercely south the next few nights and you couldn't open a window without smelling that awful smell. I could hear their voices, their screams, I could hear their fear. I had nightmares for years after.

I visited the memorials on Blvd. east that night. It was beautiful. The love and outpoor of comfort in the community. The candles, the respect, the love that was felt among strangers. I'll never forget it.

I'll never forget what it was like to visit Ground Zero, either. I went about 4 or 5 years after the tragedy. It was very emotional for me. More so than I expected it to be. I hope to be able to go back again really soon. It was almost a healing process. I stopped having as many nightmares after I had been there.

I knew of some people that died that day. I know of a little girl who died on one of the planes that hit the WTC.

I used to visit the WTC every week. I would take an extra ride on the PATH and get off to look around at the shops and stuff on my way home from school. It was very hard taking the PATH afterwards and seeing that the light for the WTC stopped didn't turn on anymore, or it was dimmed.

I'll never forget. I never want to forget.

God Bless America.

There's that empty spot. I hope the memorial will be finished soon so it can be filled again!

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